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I based my entire life on the knowledge that Massimo Cassinetti, the love of my life, didn’t want to have children with me. How does one recover from such a misconception? How can I look back at my decisions and find a sliver of reason if the only reason evaporated with his honest, heartbreaking admission?
I didn’t get a chance to regroup, to think or to decide how to talk to him. I spent the rest of the night, or rather early morning, tossing and turning in my bed. Luckily Mom was having a good morning and decided to go to a class she sometimes attended.
In the silence of the empty house I sat on the sofa, staring, imagining how my next conversation with Massi would go and coming up naked, hurt and destroyed.
When he showed up, my initial impulse was to hide, but part of me, perhaps the nineteen-year-old girl who really wanted a chance for a do-over, ran to the door. That girl couldn’t let him leave. And that girl needs to tell him the truth now. The whole truth.
“Massi, I need to tell you—”
He turns and puts a finger on my lips. “No, Blue, you don’t. Not today. I don’t understand what I did yesterday to spook you and we will talk about it, but let’s pretend for one day that this is not a second chance. That we are just two people enjoying each other’s company, having a date, unburdened by our past.”
I open my mouth to protest, but he leans over and seizes my lips. Oh, how I love his kisses. They make my soul glow with joy. They make every cell of my body tingle. They make everything better.
“One date, Blue,” he mumbles against my lips and continues exploring with his tongue.
Oh, and how his kisses rob me of reason. I know I shouldn’t agree to this because it will only make things worse, but I push that aside. What’s one more day after seventeen years? A day that promises joy and love.
Once I explain why I married Frederick, the clouds will eliminate the sunshine and God knows if we’ll survive the storm.
I lean into the kiss, getting as close as possible, consumed by everything this man is offering. Lost in the world of Massimo Cassinetti. Where I belong. But perhaps don’t deserve to be anymore.
We kiss like teenagers until the driver clears this throat. “We are almost there, Mr. Cassinetti.”
Massi pulls away and looks down. “I might need a minute before I can get out without traumatizing seniors.”
I glance at the bulge in his crotch and giggle, unreasonably pleased I have this effect on him.
“Don’t you laugh at me, it’s all your fault.” We both grin like idiots.
We get out in front of the iconic Carlyle Hotel and I search Massi’s face. “You booked us a room in a fancy hotel? Is that your idea of a date?”
He throws his head back and laughs, the sound of it lacing my heart with joy. “You dirty girl.” He fakes outrage but winks. “It would have been the perfect plan, but I figured we need to rest and relax a bit.”
“So you booked us a room to take a nap?”
“No, Blue, I got us a day, or a few hours, at a spa here, starting with a couple’s massage.”
If he offered me a marathon of orgasms, I couldn’t be happier. I can’t imagine a better way to spend my day than melting away all the stress that’s built since I arrived to bury my father.
“Your face says I wasn’t wrong booking us here.” Kissing my temple, he slides his hand into mine and we enter the luxurious hotel.
On the third floor we are greeted by a young woman whose white dress looks more expensive than my outfit. The place is beautiful, an oasis of dark wood walls, sparkling chandeliers and marble countertops everywhere.
It feels very different from a regular spa, more private. As if we stepped from the buzzing city into a calm refuge that doesn’t even belong to the cosmopolitan life.
The next several hours are spent being pampered and lounging around, touching gently, not even speaking, just being together. We even nap, for I don’t know how long, which re-energizes us.
“Is it wrong that I want to purr like a kitten?” I drawl.
We are lying on the most comfortable loungers in a private room.
“Any sound you make, Blue, makes me want to lock you in a cage so no one else has the joy and privilege to hear you.”
Why that threat makes me feel like a goddess I’ll never know. I slide down from my recliner and join Massi, sliding my hand under his fluffy robe, scraping the muscles of his chest. He turns to face me and our lips meet.
We barely fit together on his bed and I almost fall to the floor, but he rolls me on top of him. I straddle him, our chests pressed together, never disconnecting the kiss that is getting more and more heated.
I know we should stop before things get out of hand, but somehow the grand, lavish environment and the idea of a forbidden, off-limits affair set my heart racing and my core craving.
