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I look at the menu. My sisters know everything about my life, making it challenging to avoid some questions. “We’ve been through this countless times. I’ve been crying for three weeks. I haven’t heard from him. I have to let it go. And in terms of traveling, I don’t have much in savings. I’m putting my name in for a few waitressing jobs while I wait for the new school year.”

The waiter appears and says, “I’m Ivan. I’ll be your server this afternoon. Would you like sparkling, still, or tap water?”

Ivy smiles. “Still, please.”

He returns a moment later and pours bottled water for both of us. “Have you had a chance to look at the menu?”

I hand him my menu. “The French onion soup, please.”

Ivy says, “I’d like the kale salad and the Mediterranean flatbread. And maybe we’ll share the charcuterie board?”

He takes both menus. “Very well. Your food will be out shortly.”

I laugh. “That is a ton of food, Ivy.”

“I know. I can’t help it. I’m ravenous sometimes and then will lose my appetite. I can always take food to go.” Ivy puts her phone on silent. “Iris has been worried about you.”

“I spoke to her this morning before her shift at the hospital. My period was late, but I’m good now. All of the stress and travel must have thrown off my cycle.”

“You’ve handled it well. I know you were in love with him. In the past, broken relationships have taken a greater toll on you.”

I nod. “I learned something from my breakup with Josh. I changed everything to accommodate his goals and career. I morphed into someone he wanted me to be. By the time I was done, I hardly recognized myself. This time around, I didn’t let that happen. I kept my independence. And I shared things with Alex that I’ve never told anyone.”

“So, what went wrong?”

“I think I cared more about him than he did me. He has a tendency to wall himself off. He had a tough childhood. He did share things with me, but in the end, we couldn’t agree on how to handle a working relationship alongside a private one. And I wasn’t willing to be his live-in girlfriend with no way to support myself.”

The waiter comes back and places the charcuterie board between us. While pouring us more water, he asks, “Do you need anything else?”

“No, thank you.”

Ivy takes a sip of water. “The work thing is difficult. I met Foster in the office when Uncle Martin sold the agency to him. Somehow, we made it work. It seemed as if the two of you were both well suited for adventure?”

“I enjoy outdoor activities, but he’s in an entirely different realm. He takes climbers to Everest and free dives in the Galapagos Islands.”

“You could keep learning. I know you became certified in scuba diving. Maybe you could take sailing lessons and learn to captain a vessel? Or work as an instructor at a ski lodge?”

“I’m looking at different opportunities to do that. I’m considering subletting my apartment this summer and seeing if my teaching degree could translate into employment in a school in Europe or Asia. I’d be in a classroom and not out learning to surf or kayak. But there are other adventure companies. Still, I’d be worried about running into Alex.”

“The world is a big place.”

“I’d fall apart if I saw him. I can’t even explain how hard it was to get into that taxi and go to the airport. I sobbed all the way, and the driver looked shaken by the end of the trip.”

Ivy grasps my hand. “I’m so sorry, Immy. I wasn’t even in New York when you arrived back here.”

I take another sip of water to gather myself. “It’s okay. The only way through heartbreak is through it. One of these days, I’ll stop crying over him.”

She squeezes my hand. “Maybe you should reach out to him?”

I shake my head. “No. He’d be cold and dismissive. It would make it so much worse.”

The waiter places our food in front of us. After he leaves, I pick up my spoon and try the soup. I need to eat something.

We spend the rest of lunch talking about the baby. I look interested and ask the right questions. After Ivy pays the bill, we get on our wool jackets and head outside onto the busy sidewalk.

Ivy says, “Foster sent a car service for us. The driver will leave me at work and drive you home.”

I can’t keep pretending that I’m okay. “I need to walk. I’ll take the subway.”

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