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Thatcher lets out a rough, deep noise. “I’m not just saying it as his lead.” He turns to me. “Why trust Connor and Lo over us? Over Farrow and Oscar? Akara could’ve helped. I could’ve helped. We all could’ve helpedsooner.Involving the parents first complicates everything.”
“You would’ve just gone to them yourself,” I refute.
“Hey, you don’t know that,” Akara says with a frown. “We’ve all been through crap together that they won’t ever understand. SFO is myfamily. My priority.”
He’s building another family. He’s got Sulli and Banks and a baby on board.
But SFO is myonlyfamily, and maybe I should’ve gone to them first like Thatcher is saying. Maybe it wouldn’t be this messy or tense.
Except it doesn’t change what I did. And I think I’d do it the same way again.
I glance at the exit. “Can’t you take a backseat on this one though? You all need to take a backseat.” My heart rate is out of control, and I try to steady my breath.
“Why?” Akara asks.
“You’re all about to be dads!” I shout and look to Farrow. “Fuck, you’re about to have a second baby. Your job should be protecting clients and your newborns. Not me. I’ve got this covered, so just take a backseat.Please.”
It’s my last solid plea.
Akara looks sympathetic but firm. Thatcher just looks pissy, but that’s his normal face.
“Come on,” I say. “Just think about it.”
“We don’t have time to think about it,” Akara says. “Look, as your friend, I get it. You want less people dealing with your family, but we’re going.”
I blink slowly. “What about the rookies? You inviting them too?”
“No, we need the other bodyguards on-duty. They’ll be with whichever clients need security today, so Quinn, Frog, and Gabe are being shifted around. Banks, you’re on the highest risk client.”
“Right on,” Banks says. He’s kicked back against the wall, arms threaded loosely over his bare chest. “And what about Oscar?”
“He’s in Amsterdam,” Thatcher says.
Knew Oscar has been MIA on comms, but I didn’t know where his client Charlie ran off to. There are too many places on a map to guess.
So it’s just Thatcher, Akara, and Farrow joining me, and whatever Triple Shield bodyguards are in attendance.
“We’re good to go?” Thatcher asks.
Akara nods. “We leave now.”
I’m trying to collect myself, but it feels like an animal is wrestling inside my chest.Fuck me.
Farrow tells them, “We’ll be right behind you.”
They say they’ll see us in the parking garage. I lean on the cupboards, and Farrow rounds the kitchen island. He rests against the butcher block.
We say nothing at first.
Then again, it feels like we say everything. So when I finally utter the words, it’s like he’s already heard them. “I don’t wanna do this with this many people.”
“I know,” Farrow breathes. “You can do this on your own. You can.”
“Why didn’t you tell Akara that?” I ask quietly.
He looks to the left, gathering his thoughts, then comes back to me. “We can do everything alone, you and me. Because we have done everything alone, Donnelly. See, I always thought our independence was a strength.” He pauses. “But it’s not always one. We’ve just learned how to live without the things we really need.”
It strikes me hard.
