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Someone who could help the child that I’d been.
And speaking of children…
I’d made my appointment with Ezra to terminate the pregnancy, but the closer the date got, the more nervous I became.
I didn’t want to think about it, and Ezra didn’t mention it either. It was like we were both trying to avoid a disaster that was merely three days away.
“It’s getting late, Erwin. I’m gonna head out.”
“Alright, see you around.”
I walked out. Thankfully, Ezra already told me he would be making food today, so at least that much was taken care of because I didn’t think I had the energy to do anything like that today.
I finally pulled out my phone to see that he’d texted me.Done with work?
I texted him back.I’m on my way back.
See you soon, X.Just that and the X made my heart flutter.
The man didn’t have a way with words, but I could tell there was a romantic soul lying in there somewhere. Maybe not necessarily for me, but probably for some other lucky woman.
Which made me a little depressed.
I was trying not to think about when all this would be over and when he would finally leave and send me a check every once in a while as he did with the others. Every so often, he would mention something that would make me hope for permanence, like personally renovating my house, but I didn’t want to read anything into it. I didn’t want to get my hopes up, only to have my heart broken again.
I was doing so well.
I didn’t want to fly too close to the sun and get burned and my heart broken.
I paused and nearly panicked when I didn’t spot my car in the parking lot, and then remembered that Ezra was fixing it up, and I was driving his truck in the meantime. After I got in the truck, my phone dinged, and I glanced down.
So I’m guessing that’s the end of our friendship, right?
It was Brenda. I sighed. The truth was that I had been avoiding her, though not because I was necessarily mad anymore. I wasn’t. It was just that between therapy, spending time with Ezra, work, and taking courses, I had my hands full. And I still didn’t know how to address everything that was said and done.
But it went without saying that we had a long history together, and I couldn’t just cut her off like that.
I reluctantly dialed her number. “Hey.”
“Hey,” she said, and she took a deep breath, saying, “I’m sorry.”
“Brenda, you don’t have to—”
“Stop. You know I hate apologies, so let me just get this out of the way. It was wrong of me to date Mateo without telling you and also for me to bring him over to your house that one time. I didn’t know the two do you had ended on bad terms or that you still had feelings for each other.”
“I don’t have feelings for him,” I said, trying not to sound frustrated. Was that all she took from our argument and fight? “Brenda, that wasn’t what the fight was about, and you know it.”
“I know, I know. I was just trying to tackle the easiest part first. I’m sorry for hooking up with your ex.” She inhaled. “And about the rest of what was said…look, can we just meet in person? I feel like there’s a lot to say, and it’s hard enough without me saying it on the phone.”
“I don’t know.” I glanced at the darkening sky. “It’s getting kind of late today, so can we meet tomorrow instead?”
“No, I’m gonna wimp out tomorrow. I’ve been trying to apologize for ages now, but right before I make the call, I always wimp out. Please? It won’t be long. I just want to make sure we’re good.”
“Of course we’re good.” My heart warmed toward my best friend. We’d been through too much together for our friendship to end like this. “We’ll always be good. Alright, I’ll head to your apartment.”
“No, I don’t want you to drive all the way here. It’s too far. I’ll meet you at the back of Baker’s street, where they just closed the road.”
“Oh, alright. Heading there now.”
