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"NIX!" Blaise yelled before popping out of the pool and running to him for a hug. Blaise leapt into his arms, wrapped his thighs around his middle, and held him like a child. Nix simply laughed while patting his back. "You're back! Don't ever leave me again."
Nix set Blaise down while Grace sat up to look at the spectacle. Ryker got out of the pool next. He was growing his hair back out and droplets of water fell down the strands. "Good to see you again. Have you been working out?"
Nix eyed him appreciatively. "I could ask you the same thing," he said.
This reunion was great and all, but it was only stalling the inevitable. Gavriel and Callum sat in the pool still. "Is Sunshine napping?" Gav asked.
"Yes. And I made sure she ate lunch. She needs more water, though," Nix replied.
Callum climbed out of the pool and started heading toward the door. "On it. I'll put a few chilled water bottles on her nightstand. And her prenatal. And some watermelon."
Nix grinned and nodded. It was sort of surreal watching these badass men falling apart for their woman. I guess I was one to talk. I wasn't sure there was much of anything I wouldn't do for Grace and Nix.
"Can we talk?" Grace asked in a timid voice. I hated how unsure she sounded. I wanted her confidence back. She might look almost the same, but this trip had changed a lot about her. It opened old wounds. It bled her dry.
"Yeah," Nix replied with a long sigh. I knew he wanted to pretend everything was okay, but Grace needed reassurance. I needed to remind Nix that there was no running away from this. I was in it now. In it for fucking good.
Grace stood up and wrapped a towel around herself like a shield. I wrapped my arm around her shoulders and guided her inside. She leaned into me, and Nix frowned at us. Tough shit, Nix.
Grace and I were staying in a north-facing bedroom that had a view of the ocean and a large balcony. The king-sized bed had teal sheets, and the warm wood furniture complimented the bright room perfectly. We slept nearly all day yesterday. Both of us were emotionally drained and needed to relax for a bit before facing Nix. I was thankful for the break. It gave me time to decide how to proceed. I tried to think about how I would fix this for Grace as well as reassure Nix that we wanted every part of him, even the risky parts.
I knew my place now. I knew it long before I accepted Grace. "Sit on the bed, Grace," I ordered. She quickly listened and sunk onto the mattress. Nix cocked an eyebrow at me and crossed his arms over his chest.
"What are you doing?" he asked.
"Taking charge. When you love someone, you step up when they are weak. Sometimes you have to do hard things until they find their place again. Right now, Grace needs reassurance. You're going to go over there and kiss her."
Nix's eyes widened, like he wasn't sure what he was hearing. This was very unlike me. I'd been pushing for exclusivity our entire relationship, but I saw things differently now. "What?" he asked.
"Please kiss me," Grace begged.
Nix gave me another look, and I nodded encouragingly. "I'm so sorry. I thought I was saving you both," he choked out. “I’m so sorry for those awful things I said. I don’t hate you. Either of you. I could never… I was just hurting so much. I felt like it was all my fault and—”
"I know," I replied. "Now go kiss Grace."
Nix shook his head and cautiously walked over to my best friend. It pained me to see Nix so uncertain, so cautious. This wasn't like him at all, but I knew it would take time for him to feel safe again, to feel like Nix again. A part of him died when the Ringleaders took him.
Now he would have to be reborn with the rest of us and pilgrimage this new normal with Grace and me by his side.
Grace tilted her head up to look at Nix. Her eyes were swimming with emotion as she took in his slumped shoulders and soft expression. "I'm so sorry, Grace," he whispered. "I never should have left. I was just trying to—"
"You heard Alessandro. Kiss me. Make me feel how real you are. I need to know you're going to stay."
Nix gently pushed her shoulders back, inching her deeper into the mattress so he could hover over her. I played with the waistband of my board shorts while watching them. Nix landed a sweet kiss on her cheek. Her jaw. Her chin. Her forehead. Her collarbone. Then finally, her soft, needy lips. She whimpered the moment their mouths connected. It felt like a devastating acceptance. "I'll never leave again," Nix promised between kisses.
"It's going to take me a while to believe that," she whispered back.
I made my way over to the bed and sat down next to them. Nix positioned himself to Grace's side, and they held each other tightly. His hand was threaded through her hair. The relief was evident on both of their faces.
"This is it. The three of us. There's no going back," I said. Nix turned to face me with tears running down his face. Grace draped her thin arm over his middle as I lay down to look at him. The three of us were comfortable on the mattress. It seemed fitting. Nix was between us, but also the person bonding Grace and me together. I stroked his cheek.
"Are you sure? You want this?" Nix asked. "How can I be deserving of this?"
Ah, there was the root of it all. It took me a long time to understand Nix, but this experience taught me a lot about the man I fell in love with. He wasn't searching for new love because he was bored and needy. He was looking because he didn't think he was deserving of anything real. It took two people to love Nix fully. And I now had someone worthy of sharing the job of loving him with.
"I'm positive. Grace is my Sunshine, Nix. She's the only person in this world I love enough to do this with. You need both of us. We all need each other. No more running when things get difficult. No more being the martyr. We do this together, or we don't do this at all. You understand that we love you for exactly who you are, or we stop this right now. We fucking love you. "
Grace kissed Nix's shoulder and eyed me. She had a small smile and nodded encouragingly. "It's true, you know," she whispered. "I love both of you. I want this, but don't ever make me go through the pain of abandonment again."
