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And sure enough, it was Kim’s name on the screen of my phone when I looked at it.
“Hello?”
“Good morning. How are you?” she asked. Her tone was a little too cheerful for my liking, considering everything, but I remained polite.
“I told you I wanted to be left alone, Kim. I know you are worried about me, and you want to help, but I’ve got this. It’s not the first breakup I have ever dealt with, and it’s probably not going to be the last.”
“It definitely won’t be the last if you keep up that attitude,” Kim told me. “I would hate for you to throw away a good thing over something you can work through.”
“I’m not sure I told you exactly what it was I left over,” I said.
“And you don’t have to,” she retorted. “The fact that you walked out on that poor girl is enough. I’m sure she didn’t mean to offend you, and it’s up to you to pull your head out of your ass and forgive her for her misdeed. You might feel all self-righteous for what you did, but I bet you anything all she did was try to be there for you.”
I sighed. I knew there was a lot of truth to what Kim was telling me, and it made me feel even worse about how I had handled things. But I hadn’t dealt with my emotions on a lot of things in a very long time. Being in the military and K & R work afterward, I had to stuff most of the emotions I felt down until I couldn’t feel them anymore.
Then, I remembered my therapist telling me it would get worse before getting better. Damn him.
Ignoring my emotions was how I was trying to deal with this, but Kim wasn’t helping.
Even if she meant well, I wished she would just stay out of this one.
“Look, I don’t know if I’m in the right frame of mind to talk about this right now,” I said. “But thanks for checking up on me. I’m going to hang up now.”
“That’s fine. I won’t make you stay on the phone with me. But I’m not going to let you wallow in that bungalow, either. You said she would be back today, and with the two of you living right next to each other, I expect it not to go back to being World War III.”
“From here on out, I intend to ignore everyone to the best of my ability,” I said. “So don’t worry about that. I’m sure you won’t see much of me at all.”
“That doesn’t sound like the Gavin I know,” she said. “But you are hurting. I’ll give you space. However, I don’t want you to be in there alone without anyone coming around. So, I’ll be checking in with you in the near future to make sure you’re okay.”
“Okay,” I said, just hoping to get off the phone. “I’ll be watching for another call.”
“Good.”
I hung up with a sigh. Sometimes Kim did more than necessary, and I wanted to tell her that as a landlord, the only thing she should be doing for me was collecting rent. But I wasn’t that big of a dick. I was already dealing with Krissy and the messed-up emotions there. I didn’t need to add more shit to the shit I already had.
I knew both Andrew and Kim weren’t just my landlords. They were my friends. They’d become two of my best friends. And it was very kind of her to care about me enough that she didn’t want me to be left alone during a time I was this upset.
I figured I better make the most of the time I was allowed to myself before she checked on me again. From the sounds of things, it wasn’t going to be long.
The hours dragged by, and I was miserable.
Part of me wondered if Krissy would come over when she got back in town. I even hoped she would to an extent. But, with each hour passing, I knew she had to be back in town by now, and there wasn’t any sign of her.
I didn’t allow myself to stop and consider whether I was the one overreacting. A large part of me didn’t care if I was.
I only cared about my anger at the moment, and I was doing just fine licking my wounds alone. Even if I was miserable doing it.
A couple of hours later, there was a knock on the door. At first, I considered ignoring it. I had expected Kim to call me, and she hadn’t yet, so I figured it must be Andrew at the door. But I knew if I ignored him, it was only a matter of time before Kim came knocking. Or calling.
Or both, knowing her.
I walked over to the door and pulled it open, ready to tell the old man on the other side that I was doing just fine and would let him know if there were any changes.
But it wasn’t Andrew staring back at me.
It was Neils.
I looked at him in shock.
