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“Yes! A vital part of any good couple.” She shook her head. “We’re not a couple, no, but … you haven’t given us a chance.”
Sawyer closed his eyes. “I can’t. I’m sorry. With this new job—”
“Stop,” Mariah broke in. This was going nowhere good. What had started out as amazing was rapidly getting ruined. There was no way she could change his mind — not if what had happened between them less than an hour ago couldn’t do it. She clenched her jaw. Nodded once. “As you mentioned, you told me your priorities the other day. My bad.” She picked up her purse off the table and headed toward the door. “Good luck with your amazing new job.” She bit her tongue before she could say she hoped it kept him warm at night and walked out of his condo.
Sawyer had issues, obviously, and it was now crystal clear to her that they were more than she could help him through. Which sounded cut-and-dried enough, but it didn’t come close to preventing her tears from blinding her on the way to her car.
8
“You might as well level with me, Sawyer. What’s wrong with you today?”
He felt that familiar mom stare coming at him, drilling into his face from the side. The one that didn’t relent, that didn’t let him get by with a “nothing much” reply. He hated the mom stare.
And yet he had no answer for her.
They stood in the airport terminal Sunday afternoon waiting for his sister and her new husband’s return from their honeymoon. Several others who’d been part of the small wedding ceremony last week waited with them, though Sawyer and Jackie were off to the side, leaning against a wall, keeping to themselves for now.
Sawyer had been antsy all weekend. Jittery. Bothered. Ever since Friday afternoon. He’d like to be able to attribute it to excitement over the job offer but…
Without realizing it, he shook his head. Blew out his breath. “I don’t know, Mom.”
Instead of the snappy disagreement he expected, she continued to study him for several seconds, her forehead furrowing. “Hard to tell you just got a fabulous job offered to you.”
Sawyer bit down on any defense. He hated this feeling of unease, that his life was “off.”
“You’re calling Ramon tomorrow to accept?” his mom asked quietly.
Question of the hour.
Movement to their right caught his attention. Not just any movement: approach by a redhead. A drop-dead, knockout, attention-grabbing redhead.
Mariah hurried toward the larger group, her long legs carrying her on graceful strides, hair trailing loosely behind her, reminding him of how it’d looked spread out on his pillow. It took sincere willpower to stay where he was on the wall in an attempt to not come across like an eager puppy. She glanced over and spotted him. Frowned.
He deserved her anger.
Even mad as hell at him, she was alluring. She stood out in any crowd, especially today. She was dressed in a floral bandeau-style top, a flowy, orange skirt that hit her thigh well above her knee, and an intricate bunch of beads and charms that hung from her neck, some of them down to her flat navel. On her feet were strappy heels and nail polish that matched her skirt and made him want a closer look. Without even trying, she was walking sex, not in a slutty, look-at-me way, but just by virtue of breathing. Or maybe that was just … her. What he knew of her. What he admired about her and wanted to know even better.
He definitely wanted to know Mariah better. All of her. Inside and out.
She was turning heads, causing a small scene among a group of college-age guys openly admiring her from the far corner. A few days ago, Sawyer had worried what others would think of him being with such a woman, had believed a prominent surgeon should have a conservative, less-noticeable woman on his arm. To hell with that. Now he wanted to be in the middle of her “scene.”
The silent admission hummed through him like warm, soothing sunlight that heated him to the core, and just like that, things made sense. Everything. She might as well have been wearing one of those human sandwich board signs saying, I’m what you need.
“I’m turning down the job,” he said to his mom, straightening from the wall.
“What?” Scandal rang through her voice. “You wanted it so badly, Sawyer. Why would you do that?”
He shook his head. “I wanted to want it. Wanted to make you proud. Wanted to, I don’t know, overachieve or something. Like you and Rachel always do. But…” He watched Mariah as she greeted the rest of the group. “That’s not me, Mom. I’m a simple guy. Happy with the job I have. Ready to make some other life improvements that have nothing to do with work.”
When he glanced toward his mother, her mouth was open, jaw gaping. She tilted her head. “You thought …you thought I wanted that for you? Like you’re not good enough the way you are? Really?”
He considered her words, then shook his head. “Not really, I guess. You’ve never pushed me unreasonably. I think it’s … just me. I was trying to be the wrong guy. Not doing what I want with my life.”
Jackie grasped his forearm. “That won’t work, Sawyer.” She shook her head adamantly, appearing to search for words. “That’s…”
“A thing of the past,” he said, his voice a little louder, conviction stronger. “It was stupid. Don’t know what the hell was wrong with me, but I’m going to see about making some changes. I’ll be back after while.”
He was pretty sure his mom’s mouth was hanging open again as he walked toward Mariah.
