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“No, they want to kill you.”
“I won’t stay here.”
"It’s a bad idea, but if you’re leaving, I’m going with you. Staying with you wherever you go.”
Paisley's eyes widened, a surge of fear mingling with her sorrow. "No, Ben. You can't. Anyone who gets too close to me ends up hurt or worse. I’m not doing that to anyone else. Tell Carmen I am grateful for what she is trying to do, but I don’t want anyone else involved. That’s not your job. They have a problem with me and I’m not going to make it anyone else’s problem. Not again.”
He reached out and gently cupped her face. "Paisley, I made a promise to protect you, and I intend to keep it. I’m not here because I’m trying to collect a paycheck. That’s not who I am.”
She trembled, torn between her desire to protect him and wanting him by her side. “I don’t want anyone else to get hurt.”
He pressed his forehead against hers, their breaths mingling in the crisp morning air. "If you’re not staying, I go where you go.” Ben held her tightly, his voice gentle yet steadfast. "But can we please sleep on it, Paisley, for one more night? We'll talk to Carmen, make the necessary arrangements, but I want you to take some time to think. Please.” He looked ready to fall on his knees and beg if she didn’t answer.
“One more day. But after that, I want to go back. I have to.”
He kissed her forehead, his voice unwavering. "Whatever you want. I go where you go.”
CHAPTER10
PAISLEY
Ignoring the vibrant beauty that surrounded her, Paisley sat alone in the quiet solitude of the day. The sun was high in the sky, beating down on her tear-stained cheeks, but she didn’t try to hide from it. It was everyone else she was trying to stay clear of. She had no appetite; her heart was heavy, and all she wanted to do was be still and let her tears flow.
As she sat there, lost in her grief, memories flooded her mind. One memory in particular emerged from the depths of her heart: Doug, back in their junior year of high school. She had been offered an opportunity to go to a modeling photo shoot, but Doug was concerned about its legitimacy. His protective instincts kicked in, and he insisted that the only way she should go was if he went with her.
In her mind's eye, she could see Doug, tall and large, with a sweet face that she had always loved. They had been inseparable, their friendship a sanctuary in a world that often seemed cold and unkind. Though back in high school he had never explicitly come out to her, Paisley sensed he was gay. When he finally was ready to confide in her, it brought them immeasurably closer. Mostly because the rest of the world always seemed to be pushing them away, it made sense to gravitate toward each other.
Paisley understood she was beautiful but unlike all the teen movies, it hadn’t made her popular or cool. She was awkward and took a long time to warm up to people. It was a painful shyness, rooted to her stutter as a young child. Doug didn’t care if she was quiet sometimes. He didn’t make fun of her when she said the wrong thing or tripped over the sidewalk. Doug loved her for who she was.
He’d been so insistent that she shouldn’t go to the photoshoot alone, even though she was sure she would be fine. But he had looked at her with earnest eyes, insisting there were too many awful people in the world to believe she could do it alone. He reminded her no one could really get by on their own. He flexed his arm playfully, making a mean face, and told her maybe God had made him big so he could do something good with his size. He didn’t want to play football or join the wrestling team, so maybe he was built to be her friend and keep the crazies away. They were just kids. There were no real crazies to keep away back then. But over the years, he took that job seriously.
They never could have imagined his fears would someday become their reality.
Tears streamed down Paisley's cheeks as she relived that moment, the warmth of Doug's friendship washing over her. The weight of his loss felt unbearable, and she longed to hug him. Leaving him alone in that hospital was indefensible. Allowing him to be in such close proximity to her when danger loomed around every corner was unforgivable.
The sound of children's laughter broke through the haze of her memories, drawing her attention. Their joyous voices grew louder as they approached her, their innocence and curiosity untouched by the darkness that shadowed her soul.
"Paisley! Paisley!" they called, their youthful exuberance filling the air. "Did you pick the parts for the play? Can we be in it? Can we? Can we?"
Paisley forced a smile, her tears meeting at the corners of her lips. She wiped her cheeks, hoping to conceal her sorrow from the children. They looked at her, eyes brimming with anticipation, their innocence a stark contrast to the turmoil within her.
"Of course," she said, her voice tender, trying to summon the strength to engage with them. "I'll make sure each one of you has a special role. We're going to put on an amazing play together."
Their faces lit up with excitement, their questions pouring out like a bubbling stream. They chattered on and she smiled on no matter how hard it was.
The girl with the gold ringlets and muddy hands leaned in close to her. “You’re a movie star,” she whispered. “You’re going to make us all stars.”
“You’re already very special.” Paisley tapped the girl’s nose gently.
She wrinkled it up as she spoke again. “King and Ben are getting a big projector and screen so we can watch a movie tonight. Maybe one of yours. They are getting candy and popcorn and we want to see the one where you are the spy and they said maybe. You do all these flips.”
“Someone else does those flips,” Paisley explained. “It’s movie magic. I can’t do all that in real life.”
“But you’re in the movie. You’re a movie star.” She pranced away singing some funny made up song about flips and spies. The rest of the children dashed off in the same direction.
As the children's voices faded into the background, Paisley closed her eyes, letting the tears fall freely once more. Her memories of Doug and the laughter of the children collided, creating a bittersweet tapestry in her heart. Doug would like it here. Cinderhill would fascinate him. He’d be peppering everyone with questions. Sitting intently around a fire at night, listening to their stories. Trying to understand them. To get to know them. Now, he’d never have the chance.
CHAPTER11
