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“How so?”
“Because it is. Trust me.”
He tosses me glances every couple of seconds. “I don’t get it.”
Does he have to? I unleash my frustration with a puff of air. “I’ve tried school a million times. If it’s not one thing, it’s another.”
“Explain what you mean.”
Dog. With. A. Bone.
“Hollie?”
I glare my annoyance. “I was twenty by the time I finished my GED.” It took an eternity for me to return to the land of the living. A lifetime before the panic attacks subsided enough to leave home on a regular basis. “When I started a class at the community college, Jacob got pneumonia and spent four days in the hospital.”
And then came the nightmare trial, a setback of astronomical proportions.
"Then there was daycare. He had tubes put in his ears. Tonsils removed. Speech therapy for a stutter.”
“Go on.”
“Broke his arm and needed surgery in seventh grade, and by the time he was a freshman, I couldn’t put off a phone for him any longer.” And John better not lambast me for putting my son first.
He’s quiet, finally nodding slowly. “Okay, but he’s about to be on his own now.”
I let my gaze linger out my window. “I don’t think so, John.” That ship has sailed and there’s a hole in the boat besides.
“What did you want to do?”
I draw my hand down the ponytail I hastily swept my hair into before we dashed out the door. “What I want has never been a factor.”
He shoots me a frown. “Nonsense. What do you want to do, Hollie?”
Should I mention the one longshot I still have dangling out there? I lock my hands together. “I’ve been working for Dr. Mead for a few years.” I gnaw my teeth into my lip. “Actually…I’ve considered dental hygiene.”
His nose scrunches. “Hands in other people’s mouths all day?” He shudders.
“I could do it. And, as a matter of fact…”
He glances. “Yeah?”
“I applied to a program recently. I’m still waiting to hear back—but it’s silly. Even if I’m accepted, there’s no way I can do it.”
“Why not?”
Did he hear nothing I said? “It’s a fulltime program. How would I support myself during that time?” It’s not like I have a nest egg laying around.
“A loan?”
Now I shudder. Talk about scary.
He sighs. “If you get accepted, Hollie, take it. You’ll find a way.”
“I don’t know.” I stare at the passing fence posts.
“Well, at the very least, consider it, and maybe…pray about it.”
That snaps me around. Judging by his expression, he’s as stunned by his words as I am.
