Page 104 of Who I Really Am


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Unfortunately for both of us, time is not a commodity I possess. The final grains of sand are trickling through the hourglass. My two-week reprieve vanished after checking messages—finally—late last night.

I’ve no idea if it will come to anything, but along with my attorney’s bad news, Tripp left a message some time yesterday that was more than the give-me-back-my-sister demand I’d assumed it to be. Instead, it was real information, a lead regarding Ethan Anderson. After I got over the shock that he was still working on my behalf, I spent the night making plans to pull the new thread and see if anything unraveled. Sure, it’s a longshot, but longshots are better than no shots.

Annalise settles into the ugly recliner that once was my dad’s seat of choice, pulling her legs up and in as she often does. That particular pose smacks of vulnerability. I hate that for her.

I want more for her.

I want moreofher, and strangely, in the most altruistic of ways. I’m a selfish slug much of the time, but Annalise sparks a difference in me. Compels me tobedifferent.

Man, I’m a wreck. I don’t have space or time for altruism or affection. My life is on the line.

“What’s up,” she asks, chin on her knees.

Lowering onto the end of the sofa, I take a deep breath. “I have to leave.”

She seems unfazed. “Dallas?”

“No, Lubbock.”

Her nose crinkles, and I swear it’s the most adorable thing I’ve ever seen. “Why would anyone go to Lubbock?”

As I shake my head, a quick smile finds its way out. “I got a lead on Anderson. I need to check it out.”

“Oh.” She sits a little straighter. “What kind of lead?”

“Found out he was a student out there for a while. I need to talk to a guy who used to be his roommate.”

“I see.” She nods as she says this, but I’m guessing she thinks I’m grasping at straws. And she would be correct.

“My mom would probably let you stay if I asked.”

“Please don’t. I wouldn’t feel right about that.”

“I’m sorry she hasn’t been more welcoming.”

“I told you, she’s been fine.”

“No, she’s been cold. I made the mistake of telling her about my falling out with Tripp. She’s defensive on my behalf.”

“Sounds like a mom to me—and I was presumptuous in coming. My goodness, she’s given up her bed to me for two nights. Please don’t apologize. If she wanted you all to herself, given the circumstances, I completely understand, you know?”

I nod slowly, grateful. For all her princess moments, Annalise is pretty down to earth.

And why shouldn’t she be? Sure, she’s the classic little rich girl, except…she’s not. I think I’ve defaulted to that clichéd assessment a time or two because it’s easier to stick a label on than to truly get to know someone, to accept and adjust to who they really are.

Man, my focus gets skewed every single time I’m around her. I’m on a mission here. “So I’m going to Lubbock this morning, and I’m thinking you should ride along and I’ll drop you at the airport when we get there.”

I hate the way she sags. I feel like I’m abandoning her. Honest truth? Separate ways is the last thing I want. My choice would be a trip to the mountains, just the two of us, for a real picnic in a sunny meadow, shoulder to shoulder, taking in the view. Together.

There I go again.

“Look, I know going back is an issue, but I don’t know what else to do.”

Her mouth opens. Closes. “Okay.”

Dang, she’s something.

“What time are we leaving?”

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