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“I’m okay. It wasn’t me. A patient…”
Val’s car came into sight and slowly rolled to a stop behind mine. “We should sit outside tonight and enjoy the weather,” he said with a smile when he got out of his car, which quickly fell when he saw me. “What happened?”
I rubbed my hand up and down my arm, the chill still there. “Can we go inside?”
Xaiden wrapped his arm around my waist and led us into his home. The windows were open, letting the fresh spring air inside. We sat on the couch, me between them.
I sucked in a ragged breath. “I’m not sure if you saw the news. There was a shooting in East Dremest very early this morning. A man entered the home of a couple and their two children. The commotion woke up their eighteen-year-old son. The man who broke into the home was apparently the father’s brother. He had multiple priors and was a known addict. I… I don’t know all the details.” I was trying to keep to the facts the media had reported on and what I could speak about. “He shot his brother and sister-in-law, before turning the gun on himself. In front of their son. A neighbor had heard the shots and called 911. The woman was barely hanging on when she was brought into the ER. I… I couldn’t…”
Tears ran down my cheeks as I relived those minutes. The ones where we took over from the paramedics and tried to save her life. The incident occurred a few blocks from the hospital. The damage was too extensive. The bleeding couldn’t be stopped. We lost her before we could get her to the operating room.
“Her son had come in behind her on foot. He had gotten away from his home and the police. The blood covering him, it looked like it could have been his own. There was so much of it. He tried to fight his way back to see his mom. I had been coming out after losing her to see him broken down, sobbing, banging his fists on the floor. Our security guard was trying to lift him. I rushed over to stop him. I didn’t want either to get hurt. Luckily, the waiting room wasn’t full but plenty of people saw it. One of the waiting patients was interviewed by the local news station and recounted everything they saw.” Nothing I was telling them wasn’t already out there. All this information, all this trauma and tragedy was so accessible. These two children didn’t deserve to have such an awful thing public for the world to see, to remind them of everything they went through, and the parents they lost.
I lifted my eyes to Xaiden then Val who were each holding one of my hands. “Their son saw it all. I felt like someone had reached into my chest and pulled my heart out. His pain became mine. I wanted to help him but there was nothing I could do, so I held him until he calmed enough I could get him on his feet and into a room. We got him changed into scrubs and cleaned the blood from him. The police arrived with his sister and that was the last I saw of them.”
I crumbled in front of Xaiden and Val, started crying in earnest. I couldn’t keep it in any longer nor could I speak. I’d lost patients before, had to tell their loved ones they didn’t make it, but this broke me. Val and Xaiden wrapped their arms around me and held on until my tears stopped, and I was able to steady my breathing. What I wouldn’t have given to shield those children from what was about to come their way with the media, neighbors, people they didn’t know. Most would mean well, offer support and help with what they needed. I overheard the police say their aunt was on her way. The boy was old enough, he didn’t need to worry about who his guardian would be, but the girl was only fourteen. At least they had family they could stay with.
My job was more than that to me. I loved being able to help people, to be there for them when they needed a doctor most. This wouldn’t deter me from doing what I loved, though it would give me pause for a few days. Luckily, I wasn’t due back in until Tuesday, which gave me four nights and three days before I stepped into the emergency department again.
We sat on the couch wrapped together until the sun set and the crickets had started their nightly serenade. My chill had been chased away, thanks to the men heating me from either side.
“Thank you,” I whispered. It was the first any of us had spoken in a while. “I’m not usually this affected. I’m glad I had you to come to.”
“You don’t have to thank us,” Xaiden said. “How about we get something to eat? I have kebabs in the fridge I can grill.”
I nodded.
“Are there veggies on them?” Val asked.
“Of course, but I made sure to put a sauce on yours.”
“Good.” We’d learned that Val wasn’t a fan of vegetables unless they were doused in a marinade or seasoning.
Xaiden kissed my temple and stood, going out back to start the grill. I also heard him adding wood to the firepit since the windows were open in the kitchen and the sliding door was pushed to the side.
Val carded his fingers through my hair. “You okay, Doc?”
“I’m better now.”
“I’m sorry you had to go through that but I’m glad you were there for him, and he didn’t end up cuffed until he calmed down.”
“Me too.”
“I did read something about it, but didn’t put two and two together that your hospital would have been where the victims were taken. I should have.”
“I help people every day from stitches to the flu to worse. The gun violence… I’m not sure I’ll ever get used to that. I’m grateful we don’t get a lot of it here. For all the horrible things JJ’s father does, he keeps the gangs out of East Dremest. It would be a lot worse if he didn’t.”
“Too bad he can’t keep the punk kids out,” Val grumbled.
I leaned against him, putting my head on his shoulder. “Without those punk kids you got involved with, you never would have tried stealing a car from JJ or getting to know him and become his friend. I wouldn’t have met you.” JJ had told me the story once when he was working on my truck. JJ could have turned Val in to the police, but he didn’t. Instead, he helped him get away from the crowd he was with and get on the right path again. He gave Val a safe place to live and a job working at his shop.
“True. Come on. Let’s go outside by the fire. I’ll even sit on your lap and warm you up further.” Val stood and winked, his hand never letting go of mine.
I stood as well and before we moved, I leaned down and kissed him. I needed the connection. I needed to keep him and Xaiden close all weekend.
Val was the one to break the kiss first, sucking in a lungful of air. “Fuck, Doc, that tongue of yours is wicked.”
I nipped at his bottom lip. “How about I use it on you later tonight?”
