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“I disagree.” The queen narrowed her gaze on me.
I shifted uncomfortably. “I beg your pardon, My Queen?”
“You’re the prideful one here, Zell. Not her.”
“I don’t understand what you mean. How am I prideful? I was just doing my job and trying to train the woman.”
A sweet smile pushed up the queen’s rosy cheeks. “You aretooprideful to admit you fell in love with a human.”
“I did no such . . .”
That was the moment I realized I hadn’t once been patient or kind with anyone before I met Kavari. I was too busy cracking her soul open to realize she cracked my heart open and crawled inside. She put a smile on my face no one else could. I’d told her things about myself—things I would rarely speak aloud—these last few months. She was like the air in my lungs. I needed her. She was a part of my soul now.
I had fallen for a human being.
“Zell, why do you look like—”
“Give him time, My King,” Astrid interrupted. “Our little Demon warrior has just realized he’s in love.”
In my mind, I didn’t deserve to be loved, or deserve to have someone to love. “I’m sorry, My Queen, but I cannot be in love.”
“Like I said. Pride. Which is dumb. Respectfully, of course. You’re allowed to love who you want and when you want. I mean, I fell in love with this asshole.” Astrid nodded her head toward the king who smirked.
“It’s okay to be prideful,” the queen continued. “It’s up to you how your pride is used. Are you too prideful to be in love with her, or are you honored you found someone you love? Will you give in to it or let your ego get in the way? Only you can answer those questions.”
The king pulled Queen Astrid’s hand up to his mouth and kissed it before he gave her a smile, which I could only describe as prideful. “You’re such an amazing queen.”
The king of the Demons loved a woman and didn’t care who knew it. Maybe Iwasthe problem.
“I’ll break the contract,” the king said. “But we need to talk about why you keep thinking you betrayed her.”
My eyes widened, and I swallowed hard.
“It’s late, Zell. Be here in the morning for a meeting.”
With a nod of my head, I turned and exited the throne room.
Being something that I knew I had my whole life, pride didn’t have a negative connotation to me. There were numerous things that I was proud of, like the amount of souls I had collected, how fast I could fly, and how good I was at pleasing people sexually. Those were things I had worked hard to accomplish, so of course they made me prideful. I had even taken satisfaction knowing I had one of the largest wingspans in the realm, not to mention how well-endowed I was. Those are things I was blessed with, yet they still filled me with self-worth.
My pride got in the way when I spied on Kavari’s past. I shouldn’t have ever let myself do something so unethical to the only person I have ever loved. Not without her permission. I stripped her completely of her dignity and had been proud that I had the capability to do it.
If every flaw I possessed had been revealed to my lover, I would have been angry as well.
The queen was right.
My little honey bee isn’t the prideful one, I am. I didn’t know pride would break my heart.
Chapter 11
Kavari
Yourpastcanbea revenant returning to haunt your every move, devour your every thought, and destroy any self-growth you had accomplished in your life. I wanted it to stay hidden, concealed away in a bulletproof metal case with triple locks, buried somewhere deep in the sea, long forgotten to this world.
Unfortunately, it didn’t.
My past was back and even though I didn’t want it to define who I was, it did. Every decision I’d made since that night had a shadow looming in the darkness, an evil presence lurking in the corner, ready to consume the small bit of goodness I still contained. My past materialized as the boogeyman from my childhood dreams relentlessly pursuing me. And when that adversary stood beside me, offering my past while Zell learned the truth, my heart shattered.
Even though I was the victim, I didn’t want to be seen as one forever. Sometimes people looked at you in a specific way when they knew the trauma you had been through. It was like they were waiting for you to spontaneously combust . . . or possibly end your life. I didn’t want Zell to look at me in any way other than with the admiration or desire he always had for me.
