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Sammy cocked his head giving him a peculiar look, still smiling. Was there a set number of smiles Logan could handle before he wouldn’t be able to look away from the other man? Sammy’s smiles always reached his eyes, and his whole face radiated joy.
Logan had been alone for so long, that he couldn’t remember the last time anyone besides his wife and his daughter had looked at him that way – smiles unburdened by pity, or by the knowledge of his tragedy. Smiles that didn’t fade fast just so he wouldn't be hurt by the sheer fact that other people had actual reasons to be happy.
Sammy knew nothing about him. If Logan could keep it that way just so the gorgeous photographer would continue smiling at him, he would do it – at least for the day or two they had together.
“I can take you around.” When Sammy didn’t answer right away, he grinned and placed his hand over his heart. “I promise to make sure my ugly mug stays out of your shots.”
Sammy looked away, and Logan couldn’t be sure, but he thought the other man may have murmured, “Not ugly at all.”
He nodded and looked back to Logan and said, “I’d like that.”
“Okay. Yeah. Great.” His eyes roamed over Sammy, giving him a head-to-toe look, and he shook his head. “Let’s get you a proper jacket. You’re already freezing.”
Sammy tried to wave him off. “I’m fine.”
Logan shook his head and cocked his head to the house “Come on.” Without waiting for an answer, he started walking and couldn't help but smirk when shortly after he could hear Sammy's steps crunch through the snow, following him.
He quickly opened the small coat closet by the front door and froze. He had packed a lot of Sophy’s and Jordan’s things but hadn’t gotten around to the coats. Both were right there, neatly hanging above their winter boots. He swallowed hard and then reached for his old winter jacket. His fingers brushed the soft fleecy inside lining of Sophy's coat, and he could swear her perfume still lingered on the rustling fabric. He closed his eyes, then dropped on one knee and reached further for his other pair of thick winter hiking boots.
Logan closed the door and saw Sammy had been standing right there on the other side, patiently waiting for him. The sun light streaming through the front door came down at such an angle that it made Sammy’s messy waves look like a halo framing his beautiful face. He was still smiling softly, cracking Logan’s chest wide open. He was clutching his pink beany in his hands. Logan wanted to reach and touch his hair, it looked so soft, shiny and beautiful.
He handed him the coat instead and then with a quick nod to his high-tops, he said, “Those have to go too. Your feet will freeze. This snow looks nice and fluffy, but if you let it get on you, you’ll be dripping wet.”
Sammy just raised his eyebrows, bit his lower lip and looked away, leaving Logan to groan internally at how fucking creepy and suggestive he was sounding. Again.
He rubbed his face and without looking at the other man handed him over the boots.
“I’m sorry. I don’t know what’s up with me today.”
Sammy waved him off and grinned. “Honestly, this is me on most days. You're fine.”
When Sammy was all bundled up and had his camera bag over his shoulder, they set off with Morpheus into the woods behind the house.
* * *
“Look at this one,he is so cute here!” Sammy was pointing to his laptop screen. Logan leaned over his shoulder to look and grinned at the image of Morpheus chasing his old friend the crow and nose diving in a snow dune, once his nemesis had flown away anticipating the pounce.
He was making dinner and Sammy had his things all over the kitchen table, going through the images he had taken during their walk. They had spent a fantastic day outside, talking, laughing, and taking photos. He felt alive and happy and light.
They made it back in the late afternoon. As soon as he was done getting the fireplace going, he offered to cook them dinner. Sammy said he was down for anything, and Logan set out to make a thick chicken soup with grilled slices of sourdough bread. He was actually hungry, for the first time in weeks. No, scratch that. Months. He craved the food he was preparing, and he was thrilled he was going to share this meal with Sammy.
Sammy had gone for another hot shower right after their walk and then had made himself comfortable, spreading his stuff on the kitchen table, keeping Logan company while he cooked. Logan couldn’t help but notice that Sammy had reapplied his minimal makeup, and for some silly reason, it made him feel special. The gentle eyeliner wing he had applied just accentuated the beauty of his eyes.
Logan had no energy left in him to pretend he wasn’t attracted to Sammy. He told himself, he probably shouldn’t act on this new feeling, but could at least enjoy the fact, he wasn’t entirely dead inside, and could still very much appreciate beauty. Sammy’s unexpected presence in his life had shaken things up significantly. They were comfortable and easy with each other, and Logan refused to think about tomorrow when Sammy would most likely have to leave.
“So how does this work now?” he asked Sammy.
Sammy opened the file with the graphic novel he had been working on. “Well, I already have the text, and I’m adjusting the images according to the story. This is what it looks like now.” He pointed to the screen and flipped a few pages, using the cursor. “After I’m done with editing, I’ll order one print of every size that fits the work and go through it, checking if everything sits well, then I’ll start offering it to different places for distribution.”
“Do you think you could use any of the images you took today?”
“Oh, hell yes! Today was a treasure trove. First, we hit some good light, then on the way back it started snowing again. It was just the perfect combination between dusk and gloomy and perfect crystal clean snow coating everything around. I probably don’t need to go anywhere else. I’m pretty sure I got everything I needed right here.”
He bit his lower lip looking shy suddenly, then added sheepishly, “With your permission of course, this is your property after all, and Morpheus is your dog. I would also like to use some of the images I took of you.” When Logan stiffened a little bit, Sammy added, “Only if you’re comfortable allowing me to do that.”
Logan surprised himself by saying, “Sure, why not.” He went back to cutting some vegetables for the soup slowly simmering in a big pot on the stove. He meant it. Sammy was clearly very talented and if this is what he needed to finish his work, why should he deny him. Sammy had been nothing but sweet to him. This was the least Logan could do for him. He went back to look at the next page Sammy had finished working on. It was lovely. His eyes skimmed the text embedded artfully in the image…
There is no end to the journey I’ve begun.
