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Claire had a hard time forgiving Mia for blowing off the family when they needed her most, not forcausingthe attack. I told Mia no one in their right mind would blame her for that, but her guilt lingers. With time, she’ll let that go. Once she gets her sisters back in her life, the healing can finally begin.
No matter how the call goes tonight, I’ll stand by her. Not that she’ll need me for much. She’s tough.
I exhale and blink away from my thoughtful daze.
Mia catches my eye and raises her brows encouragingly.
Deep breath. Here we go.
“Well, ladies, I’ve got something I’d like to discuss before dinner.”
All three women face me expectantly. My chest tightens, and my pulse accelerates. I’ve played out this conversation in my mind repeatedly during the last week. I debated whether to tell my sister and mother separately. Then I considered not discussing it with mom at all so I wouldn’t upset her.
But in the end, I’m simply putting it out there.
Mia must notice my trepidation. She threads her fingers with mine. The gesture helps calm me enough to get going.
“We’ve talked quite a bit about the future living situation for Ma as things progress, and it’s time to make a decision.”
“Cal,” Caroline warns, her tone apprehensive.
“Just listen, sis.”
Caroline tips her chin and offers a flat-lipped grin.
My mother’s face saddens, and all her features slowly sag. She hates the topic as much as I do. Probably more.
I’m not sure whether it’s good or bad that she’s relatively lucid. It could be upsetting to her or confusing. Or she might be fine. But isn’t that how everything is lately?
On the bright side, despite being the latter part of the day, she’s less agitated tonight than most evenings. Seeing her daughter perked her up.
“Mom, what if money wasn’t an issue? Would your decision about where you will live change?”
While the seconds tick by, my mother’s eyes glaze over, and a haze of confusion settles in. She’s unable to follow my question.
Keeping my tone calm and steady, I continue, “Ma, focus on me, okay? I’ll ask again. Nice and slow.”
She nods and blinks, struggling to maintain concentration.
I slow my pace and try to be as clear as I can be. “If you had enough money to afford an in-home caregiver, would you still want to sell the house and move into a facility?”
Caroline leans close and whisper-shouts at me, “Cal, why would you ask that? Moneyisan issue. It’s not fair to get her hopes up.”
“It’s too much. To stay. I can’t,” my mother warbles, a slight head quiver that matches her voice.
Her sentences have gotten shorter lately, another sign of her mental decline. So it’s all the more important to get her input on this before it’s too late for her to have a say in her situation.
She’ll always be my mother, but she won’t always be able to communicate in the same way.
I face my sister. “We found enough money to cover it, Caroline. I need to know what she’d choose if cost wasn’t a factor.”
My sister thrusts her arms across the table to clasp my hands. “What? Where?How?”
“A few sources. One is an old investment account of Dad’s that we didn’t know about; it’s been accruing interest for twenty years. I doubt Dad even remembered opening it. Another is a modest whole-life policy he took out when he was fresh from the fire academy. It wasn’t included in the records Mom gave us after his death.”
The more I speak, the more Caroline’s eyes pop out of her face.
Finishing my explanation, I add, “There’s also a long-term care grant for surviving spouses of first responders funded by a local foundation.”
