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“Do you want me to tell you about the designers she’s worked with, items of clothing she’s worn, and which makeup she prefers?” That question was met with silence so I’m guessing Shannon has experienced similar conversations with Andi. But since she’s being quiet, I figured I'd drive my point home. “I could also tell you which photographers are her favorite, although by that point, I was only half listening so I won’t be as detailed.”
I heard a long sigh and sat back waiting for my sister to speak.
“Did you like her at all?”
“I didn’tdislikeher, but she’s not someone I’d want to date.”
“Just because of the talking?”
“Honestly, we don’t have anything in common.”
“Okay, no Andi,” she said. “But I do have someone else in mind that I think you’ll connect with better.”
My sister is a makeup artist for some of the most prestigious photographers in Manhattan so she has a never-ending supply of beautiful women at her disposal.
“I appreciate the thought, but I’m good. Besides, people will start avoiding you if they think you’re going to hit them up to go on a date with your nerdy brother.”
“My friends think you’re adorable and would jump at the chance to date you.”
“I seriously doubt that.”
“Why not? Nerds are in you know,” she added with a chuckle.
Penny and Leonard end up together onThe Big Bang Theory,but chances are, they’d crash and burn in the real world. There are exceptions of course, like my parents, but my experience has taught me that my sister’s friends and I just aren’t a good fit.
“We’re too different. Your friends are like you. None of them would be content doing the low-key things I enjoy and I definitely don’t fit in their world.”
“Relationships are about compromise. Look at mom and dad. They’re as opposite as can be and still make it work.”
“Mom and dad are the exception,” I said. “And besides having nothing in common with your friends, I live in Scranton and they’re either in Manhattan or travel all the time. Andi’s photo shoot in the Poconos is the only reason we managed to go out.”
“I have friends closer to Scranton.”
I took off my glasses and rubbed my eyes.
“Shannon, please find another project.”
“You and Zoe broke up almost two years ago and aside from the women I’ve set you up with, you haven’t had a date.”
“And I’m okay with that.”
“Simon, you’re a great guy with a lot to offer. I know you’d like to be in a relationship, you just need to meet the right girl. That’s not going to happen if you’re hiding at mom and dad’s playing video games with Andrew and Archer.”
My sister and I may be twins, but we’re total opposites, in looks, interests, and lifestyle. Where she’s like our outgoing, popular father, I take after our more reserved mother. Shannon has made it her life’s mission to get me out from behind my computer and make sure I don’t end up living in our parents’ basement.
“You know I only moved back home because mom and dad took off on their tour of the country. Once they come back, I’ll get my own place.”
After Zoe and I broke up, I moved into a studio apartment because it was fully furnished and available, but ended up living there longer than I should have. My lease was up, so when mom and dad bought an RV and planned their epic journey, I decided to move back home. Staying here will give me time to find something new and would also make keeping an eye on their house easier. It seems like a win-win to me. Shannon thinks I’m going to stagnate here.
“We’ll see.”
I swear I heard her eyes roll through the phone line.
“Shan, I went away to college then moved in with Zoe a couple years after I graduated. You make it seem like I’ve been a hermit.”
“Not a hermit exactly. I mean, you go to work and hang out with your friends once in a while,” she said. “But let’s be honest, you spend more time with your dolls than you do with people.”
“They’re not dolls, they’re collectibles. And I don’t play with them. They’re on display.”
