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Chapter3
Cricket
Ican't stop the trembling. Cookie ran a bath for me; the water is hot, almost too hot, but the shivering won’t stop. I keep seeing that monster burst through the back door, reliving the desperation to protect the baby. Flashes of blood and screams of pain echo through my mind.
My hands jerk, splashing the water around me. The spasms are getting worse, and it’s always more often when I’m upset or distressed. I close my eyes, trying to focus on what I can hear, what I can feel, what I can taste… Hot water, the baby softly crying in the next room, mint and whiskey from Jax’s kiss.
Jax… Jackson Wraith, Cookie called him…
I remember him flying through the front doors; his wolf like nothing I’ve ever seen. My brother and sister are impressive, bigger than him, but Jax’s wolf? Where the wolves I’ve seen so far are wild and untamed, Jax is the opposite. He looked groomed, his coat shining like it’s been brushed and often. The orange flash of his eyes when he looked at me almost made me lose my focus.
Compared to me he’s so very large, when he stood over me I didn’t even have to crouch. He fought forme, fought to protectme… No one has ever fought for me before. Fought with me, sure. Fought against me? Always. I’ve never had anyone actually want to fightforme.
Desperately I fight the pull I feel towards him, trying to focus again on the bloodshed. Focusing on that is better than letting myself sink into this pool of desire. I grip the sides of the tub and pull myself down into the water. It’s pink now from all the blood on my skin, and as I sink my face beneath the surface I try to focus on the muted sounds around me and not everything in my head.
My lungs start to burn and I watch the bubbles rising in the water as I struggle for breath. It’s kind of cathartic, like I’m taking control of my own future. This would be the way to end it, stop the longing for him and the horror at what happened. The easy way out, undeniable, nothing anyone can do to stop it… I close my eyes, ready to surrender, and Jax's face rises in my mind. Calling me. Beseeching me.
And my heart cries one word.Yes.
Small hands grab my shoulders and yank me out of the water so fast my head jerks at the force of it.
“Cricket! Oh, for moon’s sake! Cricket, are you alright?” Cookie is shaking me, slapping my back vigorously, tears streaming down her face.
I cough up water so hard I start to choke. The look of relief on Cookie’s face lets me feel all the guilt and hurt everyone would have felt if I’d let myself drown. Overwhelmed, I start to sob, my hands shaking wildly and my legs twitching uncontrollably.
Cookie wraps her arms around me and pulls me out of the tub. She holds me gently, stroking my hair and reassuring me with little noises rather than words. I can feel in her chest that she’s crying too and that makes me cry harder. The spasms are growing out of control and fear starts to overwhelm my sorrow. Is this it? Am I going to lose control of my body now? Is this the beginning of the end?
“Cricket, tell me what I can do to help, please!” Cookie cries, trying her best to hold me and keep me from hurting myself. I’m choking on my own tongue, unable to make words, but I reach for my backpack in the corner.
“Somebody help! Anybody!!” Cookie screams, followed by the thunder of footsteps on the stairs below us. A man pushes his way through the door first, shouts and covers his eyes, and a young pretty blonde pushes him aside and shoves him out of the bathroom.
“Her bag, grab her bag!” Cookie begs, and the blonde drops to her knees and grabs the bag, dumping all my belongings out on the floor and scrambling through them to find what I need.
“V-vial…” I choke out, and Cookie finds it, a dark glass vial with a medicine dropper as a lid.
“How does she take it?” The blonde asks.
All I can do is stick out my tongue, but I spasm and bite it, drawing blood.
“I’ll help you, okay? Trust me?” Cookie puts her hand on my chin, her eyes full of worry, and pushes down to open my mouth.
The pretty blonde crawls forward on her knees and releases a drop of the liquid in my mouth. I hold my fingers up, four—I need four drops. She sees it and immediately puts three more directly on my tongue. The medicine works quickly as it’s absorbed into my body, unclenching muscles and untangling tendons.
I shudder, relief coming slowly but coming, nonetheless. Slowly, Cookie lets me scoot on the floor until my head is in her lap, and the other woman covers me with a large bath towel.
“Is everything okay in there?” a voice asks from the other side of the door as I let my eyes slip closed as my muscles slowly begin to relax.
“She’s gonna be fine, I think, but could you call Momma? Chase, I think she needs her…”
“I think Rachel can be here faster, I can—”
“No, no we don’t want Rachel to worry. Call Momma, call Killian. If we need the extra help we can let Rachel know…”
“Ruby, are you sure?” Cookie whispers. “This is her sister…”
“Her sister? How?”
I crack my eyes open, and watch Ruby’s eyes grow wide. She stares down at me like she knows me, and her hands fall on her stomach. I hadn’t noticed before, but she’s heavily pregnant. I can see moisture on her hands from my medicine, and I struggle to sit up, but Cookie holds me still.
