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“You need to get your head out of your fucking ass and fix this. She promised Spencer she wouldn’t factor your break up in her decision to move and take this job, but if she leaves us, I’m blaming you. And trust me, you do not want to be on my shit list.”
His stare is deathly, but instantly fades into a smile when he sees Penny coming over to us from the locker room. It’s absolutely terrifying how quickly he can switch from wanting to murder me, to doting on my daughter. Thankfully, I don’t have to deal with any more shit from Landon for the rest of their lesson, but you better believe what he said is playing on a loop in my mind.
Yeah, I lied to myself for the first few days insisting on breaking up with Chayse was the best thing for all of us, but I was fucking wrong. I let my fear get in the way and dictate my relationship. I let it cripple what Chayse and I were building before I even really gave us a chance.
Penny’s lesson went well. She listens to Landon so well and he’s great at keeping her attention and keeping her focused. He even started teaching her how to dive today. The video that she insisted I take captured a perfect belly flop and the hysterical laughter from all of us when she sputters to the surface with a huge grin on her face asking if I got herdiverecorded.
We finished up with Landon and then headed out to go see my mom and dad for lunch. Thankfully we’re basically done at Chayse’s house and in between jobs. I can afford to take the day off without hurting any of our jobs.
We pull up to my parents house and I’m surprised when I see Reid and my sister’s vehicles here. We aren’t supposed to do anything with them until this evening. It’s not necessarily weird that my sister’s here, but Reid being here is a little suspicious.
Penny is squirming from excitement that all of her favorite people are here that I’m having a hard time getting her unbuckled. As soon as she’s down on her feet, she’s racing off to burst through the front door.
I don’t even make it outside before Reid is stepping out and handing me a beer. I cock an eyebrow at him questioning a beer at this time of day, but before I can even ask, he shakes his head at me.
“Trust me, you’re gonna want that. Let’s go talk.” Reid gestures to the chairs on the other side of the porch, so I make my way over and sit down.
“So, what’s up? Is this my official ass chewing?” I try giving him a glare, but I know I need to hear him out, even if I know it’s going to suck to hear what he has to say.
“I don’t know about ass chewing,” my best friend smirks like the perv he is, “but we are going to have a talk. I love you man, but I cannot handle this CJ.” He gestures up and down at me. Playing like I’m ignorant to what he means sounds like a great idea.
“I don’t know what the hell that’s supposed to mean.”
“Oh, fuck off. You know exactly what I mean. You’re a miserable fucking ass hole right now, and everyone is picking up on it, including Penny. So, since you’ve refused to tell me what the hell happened with Chayse other than that you guys are done, spill it.”
I take a deep breath ready to tell him all the reasons it wouldn’t work and that we broke up, but I can’t bring myself to lie to my best friend. Not only will he not believe me because he’s known me forever, but he won’t let me hide behind my bullshit excuses and fears.”
“I fucked up.”
Reid lets out a terse laugh that surprises me. “No shit, buddy. Tell me what happened and then we’ll work together to figure out if we can fix it.”
“You know Chayse is over doing that job shadow right now, right?” He just nods his head and makes a hand gesture telling me to go on. “Well, I may have gone over there on Saturday before she left to break up with her, but instead she dumped my ass.”
Reid’s eyebrows raised in surprise at that. “No, shit?”
Grabbing the back of my neck and avoiding looking at Reid I try to figure out how to go on. “Um, yeah. She actually kind of handed my ass to me. She could tell that I was going to end it, and instead of listening to my bullshit, she called me out on it instead. Ever since we ran into her at the hospital talking to that doctor about the job interview, I’ve been pulling back and putting walls up, and she could tell.”
“She called me out for not talking to her and trying to decide for her what her future should look like by pushing her towards this job all while I was pushing her away from me and Penny. She accused me of playing into my fears instead of believing in us and fighting for her and our relationship. She said she deserves someone who will fight for her and be her safe place, someone she can depend on and turn to in her time of need. She thought it was me, but she was wrong.” I let out a shaky breath and chug half my beer.
“Damn, she really let you have it, didn’t she?” I can’t even answer, just shake my head.
“So, what are you going to do about it? Are you going to give up, or are you going to step up and prove to her that you can fight for her and be the man she needs you to be?”
“I think I want to fight, but I’m fucking terrified and have no idea where to start.”
“I think a good place to start is to KNOW, not just THINK you want to fight for her. If you’re going to do this, you need to be all in. That’s what all of you deserve. And honestly, I don’t think you’ll ever find someone so perfect for you and Penny.”
“You’re right, man. I KNOW I want to fight for her and that she’s exactly what Penny and I need, but where do we start?”
“I think we may need some reinforcements. Are you ready to put your ass on the line and ask for help?”
“What did you have in mind?”
“Well, Landon’s already on his way, but who knows better than her sisters what Chayse might be thinking and what she needs to hear to know you aren’t going to go running scared again?”
Rubbing a hand down my face, I know he’s right, but I’m not sure if I’m ready to face them. I know they were with her on Saturday night after shit hit the fan. Landon was hanging out with Reid when he got the call and abruptly left to go to Chayse.
“Fuck, this is gonna suck, but yeah, I’m ready. You have a way to get a hold of them?”
