Page 29 of Was I Ever Free


Font Size:  

I hear footsteps behind me and I don’t need to turn to know that Lucy has followed me out. I hear a small pebble being kicked across the dirt and take a long drag before turning around.

She couldn’t be sweeter to look at. Her baby blue cowboy hat still firmly on her head, arms crossed as if to shield herself from whatever will eventually come out of my mouth and it inexplicably makes me soften toward her.

“Ground rules?” she says tentatively.

I flick my smoke further into the parking lot and turn to face her.

“Ground rules.”

“Why?”

“Because this isn’t a relationship. This isn’t us dating. It’s a…” I lazily wave my hand around looking for the right word. “An agreement.”

Anger flashes across her face, her eyes narrowing. “So what? You think I’m so sheltered that I won’t help but fall in love with the first person I… I—” she stutters, seemingly looking for the proper phrasing but her glare stays fixed on mine. “Foolaround with. I managed to be married and share a bed with a man for over a decade without falling in love, I’m sure I can manage anagreement.”

“I didn’t assume any of what you just said,” I say slowly, taking a step closer to her.

She takes a step back, her arms tightening across her chest.

“We just need boundaries for this to work, Luce. We can’t just jump into the deep end without having even tested the waters first.”

I don’t mention that I’m incapable of love. And that it wasn’t on the table in the first place.

“What’s the deep end?” she asks curiously, and with all the innocence I know she wishes she could shed for good.

I bite back a smile. Even if love is impossible, it doesn't take away how alluring she is like this. Especially when she’s looking at me with her furrowed brows and a perplexed expression.

I can’t help myself and say something that will send her clear off the edge. “Full penetration.”

She takes a step back as if physically pushed. And I am positively charmed. The front door of The Arcade opens and a crowd of five spills out, oblivious to us lingering to the side. We both follow them with our gaze until they’re out of earshot, then Lucy’s eyes snap back to mine. “You meansex?” she whisper-yells.

I shrug and fight the urge to light another cigarette just to distract myself from the amusement it’s giving me to watch Lucy like this.

“Sex can mean plenty of things. My cock in your pussy is just one of the possible variations,” I say with light humor, expressly trying to taunt her.

Letting out a small gasp, she flashes me an angry pout, then stares at me for a few seconds before speaking. “I am—I’m not a virgin, Bastian.”

I nod, having guessed as much. While on the subject I ask, “Contraceptive?”

She nods. “Lenix made me get an implant a few months ago.”

Swiping my hand over my face, I take a long breath, snapping my gaze back up to hers. “We still need ground rules, Luce. Either agree or I’m out.”

“Fine,” she rolls her eyes, and I study her for a beat because I can’t remember if I’ve seen her do that before.

We both stay silent until she gives me a look that seems to saywell?

Finally caving into the urge, I slip another cigarette out of my crumpled pack and tuck it in between my lips, my lighter cracking with a flame not long after.

I drag my gaze back to temptation itself. “No kissing.”

“No kissing?” she parrots almost immediately. “What else are we going to do?”

I fight the grin and mutter, “Oh Lucy.”

She blinks owlishly looking like she’s realizing she’s shown her cards and steels her expression into something more assured. “No kissing then.”

I nod and continue, “No physical contact outside of our little…sessions.” I unfurl my fingers one by one as I’m enumerating the conditions. “No sleeping in the same bed,” I pause, looking her up and down before she can interrupt me. “After tonight that is. And lastly…” I let the silence linger between us just to further rile her up before continuing, “I choose how, when, what, and where.”

Source: www.allfreenovel.com