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“I’ll be here,” she says.
I dip my head, the need to distance myself from her growing as the seconds race by. I need to breathe and clear my head before the bourbon loosens my tongue and I say way too much.
I’ll come back to check on her and make sure she leaves okay–might even follow her discreetly until she gets to her car–but I need to checkmyselfbefore I put my foot in my mouth more than I already have.
“Sounds like a plan. Enjoy your drink, babydoll.”
As I hightail it for the office, my head spins. Every fiber of my being is screaming at me to turn right back around and march over to the bar, but I can’t let my instincts win.
They’ve done enough damage for one day. I’ve gotten myself into a pickle I could have avoided had they not intervened, and now I’m royally screwed.
Tomorrow is going to change everything. I have no idea what Jessa coming to work at Sal’s will mean, but I do know one thing.
I’m going to have to spend a lot less time here if I want to keep my sanity.
five
JESSA
Free drinks and a job offer weren’t what I expected to gain by talking to the alpha bartender.
I would have been content to sit here chatting for hours before heading back to my car and trying to figure out this whole thing tomorrow. Even through the tipsy haze caused by my free alcohol, though, I'm ecstatic.Relieved.
Maybe things aren't so hopeless after all.
My eyes dart toward the office where Alessandro headed several minutes ago, but he’s yet to reemerge. I wish he’d come check on me so I could thank him for everything.
I want him to know just how grateful I am.
He could have waved me away. He could have easily decided that trivial beta issues were beneath him, that he had better things to do than sit around entertaining me, but he didn’t.
He listened.
He paid attention to what was troubling me, and if I didn’t know better, I’d say he actually cared.
Definitely not what I’d expect from a complete stranger, much less an older alpha.
Given how trash my exes were, it’s hard to imagine alphas being anything more than cruel. They probably all start out charming and sweet. How else would they have omegas and betas alike throwing themselves at them, vying for their attention? They start out as everything you ever dreamed they’d be, and then, bit by bit, they reveal the darkness hiding under their chivalrous facade.
That’s how I fell for the alphas in my old pack, Caleb, Sean, and Derrick.
At eighteen, right after I perfumed for the first time, they were everything I thought I wanted in mates: handsome, strong, popular, the epitome of everything I thought alphas should be. And since they were the first pack to set their sights on me, I fell for them hard and fast.
I fell for the allure, the flashy attitudes. I was swept up in the excitement of finding mates so quickly, of chasing after the happily ever after I’d always wanted. The fancy cars and expensive clothes they flaunted for everyone were nice, but I didn’t really care about any of that.
I just wanted someone to treat me like a queen, to love me like one. Someone who would consume me and fill all the holes in my spirit. I wanted someone who would complete me, and even though we weren’t scent matches, I thought they could be exactly what I needed.
Too bad I was fucking wrong.
When they knew they had me wrapped firmly around their fingers, that’s when the claws came out. Their demeanors changed from protective to possessive, demanding, controlling. I wasn’t just their mate. I was their property, and my self-worth slowly diminished over time.
It was grueling, painful, but there was no easy way out for me. Not only were we bonded, but I had nothing outside of the pack. No family, no friends.
Caleb, Sean, and Derrick were supposed to be endgame for me… until they weren't.
I shake my head, chasing away thoughts of them as I stare at my reflection in the mirror behind the bar. I can’t afford a mental spiral right now, and dwelling on the horrors of the past is liable to shove me over the edge. I need to stay focused and think about what my next steps are, despite the alcohol making my head swim and my limbs heavy.
I need to figure out how I’m supposed to keep my designation a secret while working for an incredibly sexy alpha who I can’t help but drool over. If this is going to work, I’ll have to be more cautious than I’ve ever been. Diligent with a metric fuckton of self-control.
