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River grinned. “Not my fault science doesn’t know how to name things.”
“Can you imagine if there was a branch of science where you measured things?” Dash asked. “I’d get my PhD in dick measuring.”
“Pretty sure you’ve already done enough research to write a dissertation on the subject,” Kai said.
“You’re not wrong.” Dash winked. “Wanna add yours to my research? For science?”
“He has a boyfriend,” Knox pointed out.
“I know. That was an offer for both of them.” Dash waggled his eyebrows. “I’d never say no to being the filling in that sandwich.”
River elbowed his brother. “That reminds me. Text me one of your dick pics.”
“Grab one out of the cloud. I uploaded some new ones.”
“Thanks, bro.” River pulled his phone out of his pocket.
“That’s weird, right?” Blaze asked. “Why am I the only one who thinks this is weird?”
“Cause you’re a newbie.” Nick swirled his cup in his hand, the ice clinking musically.
“It’s not weird.” River didn’t look up from his phone. “I’ve been talking with this chick and he takes better pics. I want some good ones in case she asks.”
“But it’s not your dick…”
“We’re twins,” Zane said flatly. “You don’t think our dicks are identical?”
“Touché.” Blaze went back to his book.
“Well, I couldn’t have timed this better if I’d tried.”
We all swung our gaze toward Biggs.
“Thanks for coming.” He waved toward a rickety metal stand with an ancient TV on the top shelf, the kind that looked like a giant box, and black video player of some sort on the bottom shelf. “I know you’re probably all having flashbacks to substitute teacher days at school.”Crickets. He looked around the room. “Seriously? No one gets the reference?”
“I do.” Blaze leaned back in his chair. “Pardon me while I have an existential crisis and question all of my life choices.”
“Christ I’m old.” Biggs sighed.
Nick snickered and went to take another drink.
“Nope.” I pried the cup out of his hand.
“But I want it,” he pouted. “Pretty please?”
“I’m trying to stop you from having a heart attack.” I handed the drink to Kai.
“You’re no fun.” He exhaled dramatically and turned back to Biggs. “Sorry, boss. You were talking about how old you are?”
“Holy shit.” Dash burst out laughing. “Dude, you were born in the nineteen hundreds.”
“Can I join you in that existential crisis?” Biggs asked Blaze, looking a bit nauseated.
“The nineteen hundreds.” Blaze dropped his head in his hands. “I… I can’t even rebut it, but Jesus Christ you Gen Zs are savage.”
I looked sidelong at Kai.
“Don’t you dare say it.” Kai glared at me.
