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“I have carrots in my pack-pack if you want them.”
Lord, this child has the sweetest heart, and he certainly doesn’t get it from me. All this time, I thought that was me, but it’s freaking Lucas.
“Mommy, why are you crying?”
Okay, he needs to stop with the sensitive act and I need to act like a freaking adult for a minute. Well, I can’t because the phone rings again while I’m getting myself in the car. Of course it’s Lucas, and I’ll answer it now that I have Jadon and can suddenly breathe again—not that it’s settled the drumroll in my chest.
“Hi, Lucas.”
He sounds out of breath, too, while I pull out onto the main road. “Allie, did you get him?”
“Daddy! Mommy’s crying.”
“You’re crying? Allie, just come back here.”
Oh, right, like I’m going back there. The thought makes me sick. Nope. I need the comfort of home or a new place where someone can’t just kill me in broad daylight and I can lock the doors and barricade us inside.
I need to avoid highways, probably.
The long way it is.
“Lucas, we’re headed home like you asked.” He breathes on the other side, and I catch the bell ringing in the background. “Are you leaving?”
We shouldn’t talk about Mark in front of Jadon. At least, not while I’m driving and straddling the line between deranged and anxious.
“Your dad got put on leave, Allie. He’s getting his things, and we canceled practice. He and I are leaving in five, and he’s dropping me off at home, so I’ll be right behind you.”
I breathe out some of the stress and let some relief take over. “Okay.”
“Allie, just go straight home, and don’t stop anywhere. He’s not here anymore and I don’t know where he went. We’ll figure this out when I get there.”
Yes, because he wants to... what? I don’t even know. Rumble with the rich man who probably has his own bodyguards or secret service guys with the eye tattoos and names of their victims tattooed on their bodies somewhere.
I can already feel the heat of their meaty hands squeezing my throat.
“Allie.”
Shit. “Yeah?”
“Your dad feels like crap, Allie, and please hear him out when he comes over.”
I can’t even deal with my dad right now. Yeah, sure, he was in a tight spot and all, but really? He couldn’t have casually mentioned I’m not actually related to him while he complained about eating the kale chips I made him when his cholesterol was a little high? Whatever, it’s not the priority right now. Did Lucas forget the warning from Mark?
With caution, knowing the listening ears in the back are basically recording this conversation only to bring it up at the worst possible time, I get Lucas off the phone when I promise to go straight home. Again.
I spent the last ten minutes of the drive reiterating the “don’t talk to strangers” conversation and “even if they say they know your mommy” lines. Jadon knows. By golly, this kid is always ready and excited to scream and run even when the mall Santa waves at him.
“And what about Ted? Is he a stranger?”
Apparently. “Well, Ted is just living his life now, and you have your dad. But if you see him, don’t go anywhere with him, okay?”
I’m kicking myself for letting someone I’ve always known into his life, even though there were all the conversations about how he “loved” Jadon and “would like to get to that point” where Jadon saw him as a father.
Hiccup. Vomit. Groan. Repeat.
Ted and Mark. Mark and Ted. Dad and my mom. What about Charity? No, she’s my ride or die. The reluctance has become so real in the last hour I’m questioning everyone in my life now. Funny how six months ago, I would have said Lucas was someone I would never trust when he’s really the only person I trust right now, without question.
To drop that cherry bomb on top of the icing of the cake that is my life, my biological father literally saw me lose my virginity to the boy he was reserving for his preferred daughter—the one that looks better for his public image. I can’t tell if he just dislikes me or if he despises me and would rather see me dead.
