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“I am sorry,” he whispered breathlessly.
“What for?”
“I finished before you could.”
“You came. That’s all I wanted,” she soothed him, lovingly running her fingers through his hair.
His legs still feeling off and weak he carried her to the bed and gently laid her down. He quickly went to the bathroom and returned to her with a wet and dry cloth. Kneeling in front of her, he gently cleaned her up. He knew she preferred to do it herself, but he wanted to show her how much he loved and adored her. She looked exhausted so he grabbed her a set of pajamas and tugged her into bed.
“Are you not cuddling up with me?”
“I want to build the crib and then I’ll cuddle up to you.” He kissed her forehead and walked back to the nursery.
Enemies turn Pack
Niev woke up early the next morning to Blake rolling out of the bed. She could feel that he was on edge and knew it was because of the merging ceremony. He’d been quiet about the whole thing, not having said a word about it. At least, not to her. As he was sitting on the edge of the bed, his back was turned to her, but she didn’t need to see his face to know that he was stressed. His body was tense, his skin stretching over his stiff shoulders.
“I’m here if you want to talk about it,” she offered, her voice soft and gentle.
It took him a few moments before he answered. “Yet, you won’t understand.”
His words hurt, but she didn’t want to argue. This whole situation was hard on him, and she simply wanted to be there if he needed her.
“I might not but if you want me to, I’ll listen.”
He stayed silent, not moving even an inch. She cuddled up to her pillows and watched him, giving him the time and space he needed.
“They killed three of us. They caused us pain in so many ways. Just think of Elias and how he’ll never be the same. What they did is wrong and now father is rewarding them for it by welcoming them into our pack.”
She sensed that he didn’t want to hear anything in return, he only wanted her to listen.
“I don’t believe all of them deserve to be here and I’ll never be able to forgive them.”
He stood up and she watched him walk to the door, his face hardened and his eyes dark in anger. She wanted to touch him, soothe him, yet she knew deep down that that wasn’t what he needed right now. He was angry and wanted to be allowed to feel it.
“I know you don’t feel the same and I’m not angry with you for it.” Taking a deep breath, he ran his fingers through his hair. “I need to go for a run.”
“Be safe.”
He walked out and she heard the door click shut behind him. She looked out of the window and saw his big, beautiful black wolf run by and disappear into the woods. She closed her eyes, trying to go back to sleep, but she couldn’t. Her mind was unsettled, insecurity clouding her thoughts. She was beginning to question her own point of view on the merging process. She’d always believed that the Skadu Wolves that wanted to join them never meant any harm, that they were forced to fight and regretted their actions. She understood why Tanner offered a safe haven for all Skadu Wolves and assumed his guilt for killing Alpha Loren had pushed him to do so. She also understood Blake’s side, yet was more forgiving than him or even Seth and Lyliann.
She let out a frustrated sigh and sat up. She wouldn’t be able to sleep, so she decided to start on breakfast and have it ready before Blake returned from his run. As she walked down the hallway, she couldn’t help but stop by the nursery. Blake had set up the cribs to each side of the window and had placed the onesies she’d used to reveal their gender over the cribs.
Even though they’d moved in a few days ago, not all of their things had been moved yet. She’d packed up the essentials and wanted to go back to Blake’s cabin soon to bring everything over. She’d been so busy planning the commitment ceremony that she’d put all nonessential things for the move aside and wanted to deal with them after the wedding. She turned toward the kitchen and an hour later she was placing the bacon, eggs, and pancakes on plates, ready for when Blake would return.
As she was washing the dirty pans, she saw his wolf emerge from the trees. She watched as he shifted and walked toward the porch, out of her sight. Only a moment later he came through the doors. He seemed less upset, but his face was still stern.
Their eyes locked and she hesitantly walked toward him. “Are you feeling a little better?”
He nodded and she carefully laid her arms around his waist, laying her head on his naked chest.“I didn’t mean to be so rough with you this morning.” His tone was soft and remorseful as he ran his fingers through her hair.
“Don’t worry about it. I would rather you be honest than lie to me.” She stepped back and looked up at him. “I made you breakfast while you were gone.”
They sat down on the couch and ate. Even though Blake seemed calmer, he was still not his usual self and that worried Niev.
“Would you prefer if we stayed here during the ceremony?”
“Everyone has to go and welcome the new members. That is what Father has asked us to do and not to follow would be a great disrespect.”
