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“I failed,” I repeated. “A couple days later, Dave packed up all his things and moved out. A few weeks later, I received the divorce papers in the mail.”
Jamie’s hand fell over mine, and the familiar tingling sensation wrapped around my fingers. I sighed, reluctantly allowing myself to savor the safe feeling this gave me. Despite myself, I relaxed against his touch, shutting my eyes once more.
“He should’ve never left you.” Jamie stroked my index finger with his thumb. “Especially not like that.”
“No,” I said more assertively, though sleep threatened to claim me. A swirl of thoughts raced through my mind as my head spun. I added more groggily, “I never should’ve lived. But then, I don’t know why I’m telling you any of this.”
“You’re telling me because you know I understand,” he whispered into my ear. Then, I felt his hand stroke my hairline. I smiled, breathing in deeply. Somehow, his touch reminded me of being a little girl. When my family used to spend a couple of weeks at the shore. The condo we rented was steps from the beach. The gentle waves lulled me to sleep on those nights, and I could imagine myself rocking back and forth with the rhythm of the waves.
I almost heard the swooshing ocean and smelled the salty air.
Or the gentle sound of Jamie’s voice as he whistled the songOcean Breathes Saltythat night on the roof at Stony Point.
I lost myself in the melody I imagined in my mind, falling into the deepest sleep I’d experienced in a very, very long time.
Chapter Thirty-One
An Invitation
My phone rang from the floor.
I groaned, lifting from the bed and blindly fishing below for the phone. However, before I managed to answer, the phone stopped ringing.
Fuck it.I lifted back up, without the phone, and lay back against the mattress.
Light draped into the room through the blinds, and I scrunched my eyes together. As my sight cleared, my limbs tightened. I looked around and saw no signs of Jamie. Instead of festering over it, I let the anxiety drop. It was obvious even to me that I felt betrayed at the idea that he wasn’t still here when I woke up. Though I no longer questioned his existence and that this was happening, I now wondered why it was that he kept on ghosting me.
He’s not your husband, Jemma. What does Jamie owe you?
Absolutely nothing.
Still, I remembered falling asleep to the gentle caress of his hand against my hairline, and I found myself smiling.
The phone started ringing again.
I rolled over to the left side of the bed and dangled my arm down to reach for the phone.
Mom’s face appeared on the screen.
“Good morning, Ma,” I said surprisingly cheerfully as I answered the phone.
“Good morning?” Mom’s voice sounded confused. “Jemma… it’s after three. Are you… just waking up? And why do you sound so happy? What happened?”
“Uh… yeah… just waking up.” I let out a subdued yawn as I stretched my arms above my head, clasping the phone between my face and shoulder. “And… nothing happened. Can’t I just be in a good mood?”
“You’re still taking the meds, right?” Mom asked.
As I brought my arms back down, the phone slid from my grip. A loud thud sounded on the bed. I swooped down and reached for the iPhone.
“Jemma?” Mom asked. “What was that?”
“Sorry. I just dropped my phone.”
“Okay. Well. There’s a reason I’m calling you…”
“Isn’t there always?” I asked. “I’m already sitting down, Ma. No more deaths, right?”
“No more deaths.” Mom’s tongue clicked through the phone. “But, actually, I’m calling because of Jamie.”
