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I gazed around this new world. Held my hands out. My flesh shined with a glow similar to the way I’d been in the dream the other night. I wiggled my fingers, a thick energetic line a couple shades lighter than my skin tone outlining my flesh. This didn’t feel like an organic body any longer. Everything had become lighter— a weight I had no idea had been there suddenly shed off my body.
Is this what it feels like to be a spirit without a body?
Did this mean that my physical body remained inside my house while Jamie brought me to the other side? What was going on back there while I was here?
Was I like a zombie back in Portland?
Oh, that could be a good idea for a novel…
The glow of the orange and red lights in the sky shined in the corner of my eyes. Between this and the surface of the water reflecting the lights, the lanterns seemed to surround us like we were in the middle of a 360-degree display.
On each side of us, an oar dipped into the water.
“This is… pretty damn fucking epic, Jamie.”
“I know, right?” His features became more animated, and he squeezed my hands a little more tightly. “I thought you’d enjoy this.”
“I do. Very much so. I don’t understand any of this… but I feel happy that I’m here.”
“You don’t have to understand it right now. I only wanted to show you that it exists.”
He nodded his head toward the oars.
“Well, I think it’s about time we got this show on the road.” Jamie released my hands. He snapped his fingers, and the oars sprung to life on their own, swooshing back and forth against the calm water which formed into ripples around us.
The boat swished along, distorting the reflection of orange lanterns into jagged, blurry images. My back tensed in surprise at the movement, bracing myself by holding onto the sides.
Jamie leaned back, fists placed in front of his mouth in thinker-mode. As the boat continued forward, the gentle sound of wood cut across the surface of water. There was a very light humidity—the kind you’d find on a warm summer night, when the sun has set, and you welcome the lingering heat. My brain lulled into a deep state of being, waves of light dancing all around.
We drifted together in silence for a while, gazing at the lanterns in the sky. I’d catch Jamie watching me sometimes. Other times, he’d catch me watching him. Clearly, neither of us knew what to make of this moment. We both had so much to say and no idea how to say it.
I had so many questions, but no idea where to begin.
Finally, Jamie broke the silence with his soft words.
“Do you remember the time we argued over life after death?” he asked sheepishly, lowering his chin. “In the common room, I mean.”
“Uh, yeah. You mean… the time you insisted that there was no such thing as an afterlife? The computer was donezo once it shut off. Finished. That time?”
“Yeah. That.” He let out a chuckle, then his expression grew somber. “Is it too late for me to say I take it all back?” His brows drew downward in a frown, though his lips curled subtly upward. He shifted uncomfortably and leaned into his elbow on the side of the boat. “Well… this is what happens. When the computer shuts off, that is. Our energy continues, and we float through this other worldly dimension.”
“Everyone ends up here? In this place?”
“No. Everyone ends up creating the world where they wish to live. There are no limits. And this is the world I created.”
“Well… it’s beautiful.”
“No. You’re beautiful,” Jamie said softly, completely surprising me. His sapphire eyes bore into me, melting away the pieces of my guard I kept around my heart. I froze. For the first time since he’d visited me after his passing, I recognized the younger boy I’d dated, his features more youthful seeming. My soul crumbled all over again, connecting to him in a way I didn’t want.
Why did he have to be so… charming.
Jamie shifted forward, leaning closer. “Anyway… that’s why I brought up that conversation in the common room. All I really wanted to say was that… you look beautiful, Jemma.”
I dropped my chin. “Thank you.”
He continued. “That’s the part of our relationship that always meant the most to me. Remembering I told you how beautiful you looked. We should’ve had more moments like that. It’s my fault we didn’t.”
“You act like you were some awful guy.” I raised an eyebrow. “You weren’t that bad to me.”
