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Avoidance-1
Dignity-0
It's not a proud moment, and for once, I'm grateful for Evie being in the spotlight. Never before have I wanted to fly under their radar as badly as I do now. Obviously, I'm not going to put the moves on my sister's future father-in-law, and while Judah thankfully glossed over the finer points of our meeting earlier, I know it's probably because he's embarrassed. I was an ego boost, and I'm so desperate for connection that at the first hint of feeling something other than benign tolerance for a man, I practically threw myself at him.
Biting my lip, I realize the sharp, hollow feeling in my chest is disappointment.I liked him. I hardly like anyone, but I liked Judah.
How do I feel nothing for people who want me and everything for people who don't?
"Isobel?"
Shit.I drop the menu, fighting to keep my expression impassive even when I immediately meet Judah's bright blue eyes, and I'm filled with the same eruption of butterflies as I was at the airport.Haven't those little assholes got the memo that this can't happen?
"Yes?" I drag my eyes over at Evie, who was the one who spoke.
She looks at me strangely. "I asked if you were volunteering for your applications."
I nod, grateful for the neutral topic. "Oh. Yes, I am. I really like it, so-"
"Judah." Mom interrupts, and my mouth snaps shut, "Will you tell us about the work you're doing? I heard you're with the CDC now?"
My eyes fall back to my menu, still not taking in a word of it. I should be used to her dismissive attitude, this is hardly out of character for my mother, but I haven't seen her in almost six months, and it still stings that she would rather catch up with Judah than hear about my life.
He clears his throat, and when he answers her, he sounds distracted. "Um. Yes. Yes, I'm with the CDC in addition to maintaining my practice. But Isobel, you were saying something about your volunteer work?"
I'm so taken aback that I look sharply back up at him without meaning to. Beside me, I can feel the annoyance radiating from Mom in waves. Doctor Holmes-Bradley doesn't take kindly to being told off by anyone, and Judah's redirect of the conversation back onto me after she moved it off is bound to piss her off.
"Yes, Isobel." She recovers smoothly, making a show of setting down her glass and turning to look at me. "I think it was a wonderful idea to volunteer at the hospital. Excellent for your resume too."
Dad nods in agreement, not looking up from his own menu. "What department do they have you helping in again, pumpkin? I remember you telling me all about it during one of our chats, but I can't quite remember the specifics."
One of our chats?The only time Dad calls me is to… never. He never calls me. I don't remember the last time my father and I had a conversation that didn't revolve around the weather, Evie's most recent accomplishment, or whatever meal was on the table in front of us. A bitter, defiant part of me wants to say it, wants to tell the whole table he has never oncechattedwith me about my life.
I don't even volunteer at the hospital.
"Radiology." I lie instead, feeling the weight of five sets of eyes on me as I busy myself with unfolding my napkin and draping it over my lap.
"That's right." Dad hums. "An interesting choice."
Interesting is his word for dumbass.
Judah clears his throat loudly, taking the wine menu from the center of the table. "What does everyone think about a bottle of something special? To toast the occasion."
The conversation thankfully moves away from me and back onto the wedding. When the bottle of vintage wine arrives, Judah takes it from the waiter and stands to pour out glasses for everyone, his fingertips brushing mine when he hands mine back to me. "What do you think?" He asks quietly, and though I'm still not looking at him, I can feel the weight of his eyes on me as I take my first sip.
I wish I could say I'm one of the rare college students with an appreciation for fine wine, but to me, this just tastes like someone soaked old grapes in rubbing alcohol. "It's nice." I set it back in front of me, shooting him a quick, tight smile.
"You don't like it?"
I swallow the lump in my throat. "It's okay."
But a big hand has already reached out and plucked my glass out from in front of me, and I watch as he pours my helping into his own glass, already signaling the waiter.
"Isobel." Hisses Mom, and I feel heat crawling up my cheeks. "Judah is treating us to dinner, and that is a very expensive bottle of wine. It's incredibly rude to ask for something else."
My stomach drops. "I'm sorry." I look up at Judah, whose face has gone ridged.Shit."Please don't get me anything else. It really was okay-"
"You didn't ask. I offered." He says crisply, just as the waiter arrives at his side. Pointing to a line on the menu, he tells the man, "Please bring her a glass of this."
