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Birdie choked on her soda.
“Over here, Cill!” Nina stood to wave at her friend. Their friend, Birdie amended. She was their friend now too.
Two weeks after Sawyer had come to her cottage and made love to her, he’d been back several times. He arrived late and left early, like last night. She never knew when he was coming, and usually he woke her up with his mouth and hands.
They didn’t talk, just fudged each other like rabbits. No, it had to be fucked. Fudge didn’t work for what they did. Not exactly true. She talked, and he sometimes answered her, like last night.
She’d started asking him questions so she could get to know him better. One of last night’s was “if you could meet anyone, dead or alive, who would it be?”
He hadn’t hesitated. “My father.” Sawyer had then flipped her onto her back and kissed her. But she’d heard the emotion in those two words. His father’s passing had devastated him and still hurt.
She hadn’t seen him much around town, just at a distance or passing with his family. He had come in yesterday to finish the work on his tattoo, but as Birdie had been helping Cill out, she had only talked to him briefly when he arrived.
They acted like strangers. Just a greeting and a few words, nothing more. She was starting to feel like a dirty secret. But then, what had she expected? Not once had she told him she wanted more. That she felt something for him. She hadn’t been brave enough to try to change the rules.
Because you’re scared he’ll walk away.
Birdie was trying not to look at Sawyer, who was warming up with the rest of his team. His large body was in faded cutoffs to the knee and a lavender uniform shirt, because it had been the late Shelly Lyntacky’s favorite color. May she rest in peace.
She was sure that, to Sawyer, Birdie was just an itch that he needed to scratch. She had to find her pride and either walk away from this or at least lock her door.
Sawyer had lit something inside her she’d never thought to feel. He’d taught her about passion, and now she knew she’d never settle for anything else with a man. Would it be with him? Unlikely, as he’d made it clear he didn’t want that with another woman.
And that hurt deep in her chest.
“Why are you rubbing between your breasts? Is your bra too tight?” Nina asked.
“No. I was just thinking. Sometimes I do that when I am,” Birdie said.
“Sure, that’s it and not the hot dude out there in those worn denim cutoffs and a lavender shirt,” Nina said. She moved along to give Cill some room, who was also in uniform and carrying a toddler in her arms, and holding a young boy by the hand.
“I swear this baby is coming out an octopus,” Cill said plopping down on the seat. “It’s already kicking me.”
“Hey, Ruby. Hi, Tommy,” Birdie said.
Both kids had soft brown curls and green eyes. They gave her a shy smile.
“Should be a good game,” Cill said.
“How come you’ve never played on the team, Birdie?” Cill asked.
“I’m not very good.” She’d wanted to play though. Her siblings all had, and they’d taught her how, but she’d never been brave enough to put her name forward. Which was pathetic.
One thing had become obvious to Birdie since Sawyer Duke had turned her life on its head. She had doubts about the person she’d always been and now had urges to travel. Then there were those other urges he gave her.
“Birdie, I love my husband more than anything,” Cill said. “He gave me these two and treats me like a princess.”
“That’s nice—”
“Not finished,” Cill interrupted Birdie. “He can’t play baseball for shit, but still, he turns out each week and the others never say a word about how bad he is. It’s the participating sometimes that counts. Plus, the Dukes are competitive enough for everyone.”
She looked to where the team was practicing and found the tall form of Cill’s husband, Jed. He ran to catch the ball, tripped on his feet, and fell. The ball sailed over his head.
“My man’s an outfielder, right next to Brody Duke, who has one of the best arms on the team for a reason.”
“So what Cill’s saying is give it a go. Stop hiding,” Nina said, taking another loud slurp of her drink.
“What’s in that?” Birdie asked.
