AllFreeNovel
Share Us
He sagged in my arms, all of the fight draining out of him just as Colwyn entered the restaurant. He shoved through the crowd and kneeled beside us. Harlow opened his eyes. They were bloodshot and rimmed with tears. I’d never seen him look more tired. I ran my hand over his buzzed scalp, my hands shaking as I caressed him.
“Hey, kid,” Colwyn said softly. “Let’s get you out of here, okay?”
Harlow numbly nodded, and Colwyn helped him off my lap. I pulled my wallet out and slapped a hundred on the table. Our meal didn’t cost nearly that much, but I couldn’t be bothered to find out how much our meal cost and settle the tab sensibly. I needed to be near Harlow. And hopefully, the massive tip would soothe the no-doubt overworked and overtired waitress.
I met Colwyn and Harlow on the sidewalk. Harlow was breathing deeply, the heels of his hands pressed to his eyelids. His entire body was shaking, and he was extremely pale.
“Har?” I asked softly.
He slowly dropped his hands, looking at me. I stepped closer to him but then paused, unsure if he wanted me when he was this fragile. Swallowing thickly, he dragged me closer to him, wrapping me in his strong arms. I clung to him, twisting his shirt in my fingers as I burrowed my face into the curve of his neck, breathing him in. He smelled like sweat and the ocean, and it calmed my racing heart some.
I just wished I could offer him the same comfort.
“Come on,” Cowlyn said gruffly, opening his back door. “Get in. Let me get you two home. Harlow needs rest.”
Without a word, Harlow released me and slid into the backseat. I slid in after him and then pulled him back to me, holding his trembling body in my arms. He rested his head on my chest, his arms wrapped around my midsection. His shaky breath fluttered over my shirt, bleeding through the material to warm the skin of my chest.
It didn’t take us long to get to Harlow’s house, and when we got out, he went on inside, not saying a word to Colwyn. I frowned, turning to face the older man.
He sighed, shoving his hands into his pockets. “I’m not offended,” he assured me. “Trauma is a fickle thing, and Harlow just had averyviolent flashback. He needs to see his therapist tomorrow. From what I know, he hasn’t had a flashback in the middle of the day like that before. Do you know what might have triggered it?”
I shoved my hands through my hair. “We were watching a movie while we were eating. There was an explosion. He picked the movie, but I didn’t know—” I choked on my words, tears stinging at my eyes. I pressed the heels of my hands to them, sucking in a deep, sharp breath.
Colwyn settled his hand on my shoulder. “He may not have known either, Xavier,” he tried soothing me. “This isn’t going to be easy. He’s going to be out of it for a while. Just be there for him, and when he’s a little more stable, try to talk him into going to see his therapist tomorrow.”
I nodded, dropping my hands to my sides. Colwyn squeezed my shoulder before releasing me and sliding back into his car. I quickly went inside. Harlow was sitting on the couch, his shirt off, his skin glistening with sweat. Without a word, I settled on the couch beside him.
He looked over at me with tears in his eyes, his breath hitching in his throat. “That hasn’t happened before,” he croaked.
I opened my arms in invitation, and he quickly maneuvered himself into them, seeking my comfort. He pushed my shirt up, resting his naked skin against mine, his ear pressed to my chest right above my heart. He clung to me, his arms steel bands around my torso.
“You need to see your therapist,” I whispered.
He nodded. “I already texted her to let her know I need to see her tomorrow. I’ll be going in first thing in the morning.” He squeezed his eyes shut, his lashes fluttering against my bare skin. “Please don’t leave me, Xavier.”
I linked my legs around him, suffocating him in everything me, but he settled some, his breaths easing a little bit, no longer so choppy and strained.
“I won’t go anywhere,” I promised him.
11
Harlow
Ihadn’t felt this tired…ever, really. Not even when I was barely getting a lick of sleep. Not even when I pulled all-nighters on overnight watch while in the military.
This was a bone-deep weariness. A soul-deep tiredness. I was tired of living at this point, and I wasexhausted. The only thing that kept me putting one foot in front of the other was Xavier’s broken-hearted face flashing through my mind. Fuck, the way he’d cried over me shattered what was left of my heart after losing Carl.
Seeing him trying to be strong for me all while he broke apart too had nearly killed me inside.
I pushed open the door to my therapist’s office. The receptionist, Katie, looked up at me with a soft smile. “Hey, Harlow,” she greeted. “Go ahead and sign in here. I’ll let Mabel know you’re here.”
I silently nodded my head and scribbled my name onto the clipboard along with the time and date before dropping into a chair against the wall. I closed my eyes and released a slow sigh, trying to calm my mind. But nothing was working.
All I could see was Carl, and when I managed to push his bloodied body out of my mind, I saw Xavier’s tears running down his beautiful face.
Pulling my phone out of my pocket, I stared at Xavier’s face on my phone background. We’d barely been together, but fuck, that man had a way of worming himself beneath my skin. He was inside me and all around me, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. Fuck our past together. We were kids, and he was hurting. That boy had only wanted someone to hurt as much as he did.
It was wrong, but shit, I couldn’t fault him. It wasn’t his fault his parents were shitty human beings.
