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There were many things my mother couldn’t afford to give us growing up. Sometimes the necessary resources were outside of her means. In our household, sometimes, a can of ravioli had to be shared between three, or worse, many nights, we had to go without, and I completely understand that. I would never hold Mom’s financial struggles against her.
But love? Withholding her love from my siblings and me was always a choice. And that’s what hurt the worst.
Maybe that’s why accepting affection from outsiders was always such a damn struggle for me. Hell—I remember the little pang of anxiety I felt the first time I heard Davis utter those three little words.
I never expectedanyman to ever care for me. But a guy like Davis? It felt impossible to believe that someone as incredible as him could actually love me for me.
* * *
“Your body is so perfect…”Davis whispers, his lips traveling up the length of my throat.
“Davis. Babe, your body is perfect, too.” My neck is twisted at the most awkward angle and half of my ass is hanging off the side of the seat. My butt cheeks are going numb but I’m too happy to care. I awkwardly wrap my leg around the back of his to keep from toppling off.
My boyfriend braces one elbow on the headrest, propping himself above me to smirk in my face. “I know, right?! I’m pretty damn sexy, if I do say so myself.”
Biting back a laugh, I slip my hands into the back pockets of his jeans and give his ass a hard squeeze. “You’re so cocky, Davis Westbrook. Why do I let you make out with me?”
He doesn’t hesitate. “Because you fucking love me.” And then he drops his lips to mine and unceremoniously shoves his tongue into my mouth, hot lust and cheap whiskey on his breath.
Now, tongues are battling and limbs are flying in the backseat of Cash’s car.
“Ouch! Do you mind?” Meghan glares at us from the front passenger seat. I startle. I almost forgot Davis and I aren’t in here alone.
Davis eases off of me to offer my best friend an apology. “Oh, sorry, Megs.”
She lifts an eyebrow. “Should I wait outside? Give you two some privacy?”
“No, don’t leave me alone with this caveman!” I nudge my boyfriend off of me and straighten in my seat. “Seriously, Meghan. Don’t go. We’ll be good. Promise.”
Her eyes flick between us and beneath her feigned annoyance, I see flickers of amusement. She’s fighting not to smile. I love my best friend so much.
“Fine. I will continue to grace you with my presence.” She wriggles her nose at me.
I grin with relief. “Thank you, kind madam.” I try to take a bow. I bang my forehead on the headrest.
I break into drunken laughter. Davis joins in.
My eyes swing to him with a stern look. “By the way, I never told you I love you.”
His eyebrow jerks upward. “You love me.” He says confidently, not one doubt in the world.
I melt, because deep down, I really do. He’s such a great boyfriend. Sometimes, I still can’t believe that out of all the girls in school, he picked me.
But I don’t know how to tell him how I feel. I’m so terrified that if he had any idea how much I like him, he’d take off running in the opposite direction.
I really, really, really like him. I love him.
“Oh, yeah?” I challenge, because playing hard to get is way easier than putting it all out on the line.
I want to give him my virginity. I’d give it to him tomorrow if he’d only take it. We’ve fooled around—a lot—but the truth is, I’m panicking. A part of me is scared that if I don’t have sex with him, he’ll get bored. He’ll leave me.
And I’ll die.
Dramatic, I know. But I’m certain that my 16-year-old heart wouldn’t survive the wreckage.
But Davis doesn’t want to pressure me into anything. He says maybe we should wait. I don’t feel pressured, though. I’m sure.
I think. No, for real—I’m sure. Maybe.
