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Once we’ve finished putting the brownies in the oven—and by we, I mean me, because toddlers shouldn’t touch ovens—I grab the little guy and take him upstairs to the bathroom to clean him up, careful not to track any of the chocolate and flour upstairs when I go.
It’s a quick bath for him, and then I’ve got him dry and changed into a new set of clothes.
“Nap,” he tells me.
I give him a nod.
“That’s right, mister. Nap time! You want me to read to you or are you super pooped?”
He giggles.
“Poop.”
I smile at him. Little teaser.
I sit in the rocking chair and he climbs into my lap after picking out The Very Hungry Caterpillar. He’s asleep before the tiny caterpillar becomes a big fat caterpillar, but I finish the book anyway then sit for a while with him in my lap like that.
Sure, he should probably nap in his bed, but sitting like this isn’t so bad. Less risk of him waking up.
So I just stay there, rocking slowly back and forth as Teddy dozes against me.
Today marks two months of working at the Palmer house, and I have to say, the connection I feel to this cookie monster in my lap is very different from how I felt about the Keifer kids.
I don’t know if it’s that there’s only one of him so all my attention is laser focused, or maybe it’s because he’s just such a sweetheart with the biggest smile and bubbliest personality. Maybe it’s as simple as the fact I know he doesn’t have a mother anymore, and my nurturing heart wants to reach out and fill that role for him because he’s not getting it elsewhere.
All I know is there is a part of me that’s falling in love with Teddy, and that makes me nervous.
As a nanny, we’re supposed to try to separate our emotions. We aren’t parents, we’re staff, and that’s something Jorrine hammered into my head when she agreed to be the person who helps me find work. I didn’t think anything of it and had no issues at the last place, so I assumed maybe I was just immune.
Clearly not.
That’s a problem, because at some point, Colton isn’t going to need me anymore, and that means I won’t be a part of Teddy’s life.
Just thinking about it causes something to tighten in my chest, so I close my eyes and give him a few more good rocks before I hoist him up and lower him carefully to his bed. I tuck him close to the wall and make a mental note to talk with Colton about possibly getting a bumper for Teddy so he doesn’t risk falling out of the bed.
My smile returns when I think about Colton, about how fun and playful things have been between us over the past week. We flirt shamelessly with each other whenever our paths cross in the house, Teddy’s youthful lack of awareness allowing us to get away with more than we would be able to under different circumstances.
The best part about it is that it feels fun. And sexy. And good as hell.
There’s a part of me that worried about pushing him to join me in the pool last night. But if anything, it almost feels like something released inside of him. Something eased as he stepped into the water with me, opened up a kind of safety between the two of us that I wasn’t expecting.
And the way he kissed me this morning before he left for work?
A long, searching, drugging kind of kiss that felt like a promise of more sexy fun to come…well, damn.
I head back down to the kitchen to clean up the flour and chocolate and check on the brownies, which should be finishing up in the next few minutes, then make quick work of cleaning up the rest of the kitchen.
I’m just finishing up the last of the dishes when I think I hear a knock at the front door.
Crossing the living room, I look through the peephole, not recognizing the woman standing on the other side of the door. I pull the door open all the same.
“Hi, can I help you?”
Her eyes scan me from top to bottom, and I can tell without her saying a single word that I’m not going to like anything that comes out of her mouth.
“Well, you’re not at all what I expected. Though I guess someone like you would be much more Colton’s speed.”
My eyes widen and then narrow as I try to interpret what she’s saying.
