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“When you were saying your wedding vows, did it ever cross your mind that one day, we would have to break them?”
He traps my hand to his heart. “No, not in a million years.”
We’re silent as I resume tracing circles on his chest. Then I ask, “Do you ever regret us not having kids?”
He shifts a little, coming fully awake. “I wouldn’t have minded having kids, but I don’t have regrets. In any case, I see my brother’s children a lot and get the best of both worlds—the fun parts without the responsibility.” He runs his fingers through my hair on the pillow. “Why do you ask? Do you have regrets?”
“No, not really. Just like you, I get to play auntie with Harper’s kids. I get moments though, you know, when I wonder what it would have been like to grow a baby in my belly and to nurture a new life. But then, I realize it just couldn’t have worked. Not with my life the way it is.”
He strokes my cheek gently. “How about now? Forty-one is still possible if you wanted to try for one.”
“Are you saying you’d have a baby with me if I wanted to?”
“In a heartbeat, yes.”
I take a shaky breath. “Jesus, Wyatt. You make it so fucking hard.”
“Hard to do what?”
“Hard to get on that spaceship and pick up my life on Mars.”
“Then don’t. Nothing’s stopping you from staying here. You said yourself you wanted a change.”
“For one thing Wyatt, we’re divorced. Remember? And yes I want a change from living in the artificial world of Mars where I don’t get to step outside for some fresh air. But that doesn’t mean I want to quit.”
He rubs his eye irritably. “And then we’re back to square one.” After a while he says, “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to rehash all this.”
“Don’t be. I was the one who started this conversation.” I huff out a deep breath. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have.”
He sighs. “Come here.”
I let him spoon me to his body and close my eyes. Later, much later, sleep eventually comes.
Chapter 4
Melinda
Decision made about the direction I want to take in my career, I make a plan of action. As soon as we get back to Washington, I start contacting people. My first port of call is my good friend, Elise Dawson, who is probably the only person I trust in the shark infested waters of the Washington political scene. We interned together at the same congressman’s office many years ago. Now, she works as a lobbyist, and her eyes and ears are everywhere.
We meet for brunch at our favorite eatery in Penn Quarter. I’ve already been here a few minutes and ordered my drink, when I see her glide smoothly towards my table, looking well put together as always. I stand and give her a hug.
“Melinda, how good to see you.”
“You too Elise. You’re looking well.”
She brushes her hair back and smiles wickedly. “It’s the latest toy boy in my life. Keeps me young.”
I laugh. “That it does!”
We settle down at our table and order our food. Once that’s out the way, she leans back in her chair and observes me. “So, tell me your news.”
For the next few minutes, I update her on the latest happenings from my Mars posting. I ask her about the new gossip in town and she fills me in. By this time, our food’s arrived, and I take a moment simply to enjoy the pan fried fish and fresh crisp salad on my plate. That’s another thing I miss on Mars. Apart from a couple of special occasions where we’ve had real meat sent to us from Earth, the rest of the time our food has consisted of rehydrated protein, pasta and rice, with a few vegetables grown in the hydroponic greenhouses. It’s not bad, and the food has gotten better over the past year, but nothing beats the fresh stuff here on Earth.
I’m savoring the last bite of my fish when Elise raises an elegant brow and regards me with her warm brown eyes. “So, Melinda. What next for you? If you’re looking to get back in the Washington scene, I have a few suggestions for you.”
I put my fork down. “Actually, no. I was thinking more in terms of a diplomatic mission to Ven.”
“Ah. Are you sure you want to go on living off planet?”
