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And so, as the night went on, I went out onto the small stage of the dive bar. This time, there really was just enough room for a stool and a microphone like how I did it during my tour show. It hadn’t changed from five years ago either. I could still vividly remember my younger self performing my very first officially released song on this tiny stage. That was also the day I knew what I was meant to do in my life.
“Well, good evening, everyone. Thank you for coming,” I spoke into the microphone, but I was easily overpowered by the deafening cheers of the people inside and outside the venue. “So this show is very special to me. Not only is it a surprise pop-up concert, but it was a surprise to all my staff as well." A wave of chuckles rippled out across the crowd. "Thank you, especially for my people for putting this together. But I couldn't wait. I’m here to perform new songs. Brand new songs, thirteen of them, from my upcoming album,Sunflower,that’s going to drop at midnight tonight.”
Man, if I thought the first round of screams was deafening, the second one was about a hundred times louder and it was definitely longer. It was so loud that I spotted Sadie and Thalia having to cover their ears – a very reasonable reaction. But with that, I started to perform the new songs, and I loved how almost all of them tried to sing along after hearing the chorus for the first time. Some of them already knewFlowers, the song I had clearly written about Thalia and Luna. Thalia, however, sang along to every single one, knowing them by heart already.
I didn’t even realize it, but time flew and suddenly I had performed the entirety ofSunflowerto the crowd. As I looked out, everyone was standing inside the small dive bar. I stood up and bowed, thankful to everyone for coming to the show. It honestly felt like how it was five years ago. They didn’t know the majority of the songs I played, yet I still managed to make a connection with them. It was a nice reminder of where I came from and how I got to where I am today. It all started with this one gig… and I wanted that same start to happen to someone else. Without wasting another second, I shot Thalia a knowing look, and while she was clapping for me, she slowly realized what I was about to do. After all, I did say I was full of surprises.
She wasn’t saying no to it, but she looked apprehensive. I was committed to doing what she wanted to do, but she wasn’t clear, so I gave her a little questioning nod. She then started to look around the crowd, knowing that these people came here for me, but I also knew she was smart enough to realize that any crowd at the beginning of any music career wasn’t there for you; you had to win them over. I shot her one last questioning nod as the crowd continued to applaud me, and I watched as she took a deep breath… and finally, she nodded back.
Chapter 25
Thalia
Ididn’tunderstandmyself.I had hoped for this. I had prayed for this. I once looked up into the stars and asked for this very moment: the moment when I was given another chance to pursue my dream. Another chance to try to make a name for myself by writing songs that people could relate to. One more chance to perform in front of a live audience with my songs. The best part was that Damian was right there, signaling me to take the chance, and I accepted it, but I was so incredibly frightened. And that was the biggest part I couldn’t understand about myself. I… wanted this.
“Ladies and gentlemen, thank you so much for being an amazing crowd. You all gaveSunflowerso much love and I hope with all my heart that you guys will continue to enjoy my latest album…” Damian was starting to conclude his show, but I could still see him stealing glances my way, probably checking if I was going to change my mind.
I started to fidget from the nerves, and it was then that Sadie realized my restlessness.
“Something the matter, Thalia?” She asked, concerned. “Do you need to go out for some air? It's rather stuffy here.”
I shook my head no, then leaned into her ear.
“Damian’s gonna let me take the stage.” I was expecting her to be shocked about what I said, but she just simply pulled away and offered me an excited and friendly smile.
“You know, we'll always support you no matter what you want to do, right?” Sadie assured me. “This is what you've always wanted. You know you have talent, and that talent needs to be shared with the world. I would love for you to take the stage and show them what you’re made of, but it’s still up to you.”
I appreciated Sadie’s support but also her understanding.
“But what would I even perform? I literally only had one song released,” I reminded her, and it wasn’t even a song that came close to how Damian meteorically rose back in the day.
“So that's a pretty easy answer,” Sadie laughed, like it was the simplest thing in the world. “Remind everyone here who you are, and don’t ever let them forget you again,” she added, placing a hand on my shoulder. “And when you do make it, please don’t postpone your world tour with an hour’s notice,” she chuckled. I responded with a tight hug and as genuine a smile as I could as thanks for her being there for me.
“But I want you guys to stick around for one more performer. Is that alright with you?” Damian asked the crowd after he finished promoting his album. The crowd was very receptive to his request, and they all clapped and cheered. “I wanted to give this incredible person a little time in the spotlight. Without her help, we wouldn’t have been able to makeSunflowera possibility.”
Damian was looking directly at me now with a toothy grin on his handsome face.
“I can do this, I can do this, I can do this,”I repeated in my inner monologue over and over again to get myself to calm down. I had made a lot of sacrifices in my life, including the opportunity to break into the music industry, and Damian promised me that he was never going to let me sacrifice that much again now that he was by my side. This was his way of showing that, and I had to take it while I could. I had to be brave and step into the spotlight once more.
“And you know what, some of you might even recognize her,” Damian continued his introduction as I slowly started to walk near the side of the stage where I could get up and take his place. “Please welcome to the stage… none other than Thalia Santana!” He finally introduced me, and I mustered up all of my courage to run up the stage and smile and wave to the crowd. I just had to remember my training from five years ago, and I was gonna be fine.
The crowd clapped and cheered for me, though it seemed like they were either being respectful or just following what Damian said. Either way, I had their attention, and I had to make sure to keep it now that I was in front of them. In a turn of events, however, Damian started to remove his iconic blue guitar from his body, then he gave it to me.
“It’s your turn now,”he mouthed to me, then flashed me his billion-dollar smile, and I had no choice but to take it from his hands. It was weird, to say the least. I never envisioned anyone else holding his signature guitar – much less myself.
I strummed a few chords to try to calm myself down as the crowd continued to cheer. I felt like some of them were trying to get a closer look at me, trying to figure out who I was. Maybe I left some form of mark on them, and I was already grateful for even just that. But again, it was my time to leave a new one.
I faced the crowd again with an inviting smile as I slowly built up my guitar strumming leading toward the chord progression of my one and only song.
“Good evening, everybody. I'm Thalia,” I greeted, trying to shake away all the shivers in my voice. “And I’m going to perform for you the only song I put out into the world… so far,” I teased, and it earned a few reactions from the crowd. Without wasting any more time, I started to play the song, and it elicited a few curious head tilts from some of the patrons. I was beginning to think they recognized it. I had to take this opportunity to get to the catchiest part as quickly as possible: the chorus.
“Little girl, young and brave. Why is there sadness across your face?Have you ever seen the stars dim out? Don’t worry, that’s not what you’re about,”I sang, my heart beating rapidly as I saw the crowd slowly starting to remember my song.“Oh, so young, yet so worried. The world is yours if you just take it.”As I started the chorus, a handful of people had a look of realization on their faces, and they began to cheer and sing along.
“No, this isn’t something to misread. You’re that girl who’s gonna make it,”the crowd sang along with me, making a very wide grin spread on my flushing face.
“Oh, so young and so naïve. The world is your tapestry for you to weave,”I continued, and at this part, almost the entire crowd was singing along to my feel-good self-empowerment song.“It’s okay, don’t you dare quit. You’re that girl… You’re that girl who’s gonna make it.”
By then, I could hear even the crowd outside singing the song with me, and I had never felt so… fulfilled in my life. Damian and Sadie brought out their cell phone flashlights and started to sway along to my song, and everyone immediately followed suit as I continued my performance. This was the culmination of everything I ever wanted. My life has been hard ever since I got pregnant, and I was never going to be ashamed of that. I loved Luna with every fiber of my being, and at the same time, I was still a woman who had a dream in her heart. With all the crappy jobs, the eviction notices, the bills due..all of that and all of my perseverance led to this.
