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“Dumbest?” he grimaced.
“Seeing someone at your home was a blessing in itself, Milo. As much as you’d like to believe we can pick back up where we left off, that’s untrue. We can’t.”
“I’m not trying to.”
“What are you trying to do?”
“Give my son a two-parent home, stability, and twice the love.”
“Without us being together, he’ll have that. If I thought otherwise, I would’ve continued with the plans of using a sperm donor. I don’t think for a second he will lack in any category.”
“That’s true, but what does it hurt to try?”
“My heart.”
“Nay, come on. Cut a nigga some fucking slack, baby.”
His referral nearly strangled me. I rubbed a hand against my chest, recovering from the blow.
“I don’t think you understand Milo.”
“Then, help me.”
“Without a doubt, there will never be another person in this world that I’ll ever love the way I loved you. The way that I love you.”
“Love me?” He scoffed, taken aback.
“Please don’t act as if that’s a surprise.”
“I just–”
“The other night, when I poured my heart out, ready to risk it all, throwing all caution to the wind, seeing your company descend stairs that I’d imagined myself coming down countless times in my dreams – day or night – crushed me. I don’t think you’re comprehending, Milo. The one time I was ready, the universe said, NO. And I’m going to listen. I’d be a fool not to.”
Resting his back against the booth, he nodded, accepting my response.
“I won’t stop.”
Shaking my head, I avoided eye contact by lowering my eyes to my plate.
Please don’t.
“A slight delay isn’t equivalent to denial.”
“There are thousands of girls, Milo.”
“I want the one in front of me. The one that I deserve.”
“I doubt very much that you deserve me, with all due respect.”
Leaning forward, he looked in both directions before speaking. And when his mouth opened, my eyes and ears opened. He had my undivided attention.
“Nay, ain’t no nigga out here going to dick you down like me. Ain’t nobody going to stuff that pussy in their mouth like me. Nobody knocking that pussy down like me, he chuckled, presumptuously.
“I’m sure of it. And that’s just the small shit. My account is expansive. You can have it all if you want. Ain’t no limits when it comes to you. I don’t give a fuck about you having your own. You’ve got mine, too. Ain’t a nigga in this city going to step ’bout you like I am. Lay my shit on the line if it means saving yours. Plus, that little nigga in your womb, I put him there.
“So, yes, I deserve your fine ass. Niggas haven’t and aren’t willing to put in the work I am to secure my spot. And furthermore, I’m not concerned with what the fuck they’re willing to do unless it’s lay down behind it because I’m willing to end a motherfucker ’bout you. I’m down bad and I ain’t afraid to admit it.”
His face. I wanted to ride his face as he repeated himself.
