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But it didn't last for long.
Because as Jake considered Lauren's words, he knew that it was already too late for them. He'd failed her before, and he'd always blame himself for that. But now, he had Fiona too, and she deserved better. He feared he wouldn’t be able to commit to Fiona either. He had strong feelings for her, but he didn’t trust himself.
The truth was, they both deserved better.
Jake couldn't keep hurting people he loved.
So, he looked Lauren in the eyes and said, "Lauren, I'm sorry, but... I can't. I can't be with you again."
His heart wrenched when he remembered the way her face had shattered like glass. He still felt guilty. But in the end, Lauren had thanked him for finally being honest and definitive.
After that, Jake had gone over to Fiona's apartment and told her that he couldn't be with her either.
Fiona had taken it well, but after that, he'd heard from Whittaker that she was taking a step back from fieldwork for a while so she could focus on training and her usual lab work.
"Agent Tucker?" Lara's voice broke through his reverie, her brow furrowed in concern. "Are you alright? You looked like you were a million miles away."
"Sorry," Jake replied, shaking off the memories and forcing a smile. "I'm fine. Just lost in thought for a moment there."
"Alright," Lara said hesitantly, clearly not convinced but deciding not to push further. They returned to their paperwork, the silence once again settling over them like a heavy shroud. This was the way it was supposed to be; two agents working diligently, no feelings in the air between them. As much as Jake missed Fiona, he tried to tell himself that this was better. But the truth was, he was worried about her. He'd heard about how the suspect in her sister's disappearance, the woman who seemed to know everything, had died in her cell. And now Fiona was left with no answers. Jake wanted to talk to her about it, to comfort her or offer some advice, but he had nothing.
He knew all too well what it was like to not have answers. After his mother was murdered, the killer was never found. Jake had been looking into the case periodically, but it was so devoid of information that he didn't know what to do. The killer had left no DNA, and there had been no indication that his mother had ever made any enemies. Moreover, as far as Jake could tell, no other crimes matching the exact MO were ever reported.
It didn't make any sense. The fact that Fiona had been looking into her sister's disappearance had inspired Jake to look into what happened to his mother on his own time, but so far, he'd had no luck.
As Jake continued to work on the paperwork, his mind wandered back to Lauren once again. He couldn't help but wonder what would have happened if he had chosen differently if he had chosen to go back to her instead of pushing her away. Would things be different now? Would he be happier?
But the more he thought about it, the more he realized that he had made the right decision. He couldn't keep going back to the past, to a love that had already failed.He had to look to the future. Even if that meant just focusing on being a good agent and worrying about the rest later.
Just then, Jake’s phone rang. He picked it up, only to see Chief Whittaker’s name on his screen. He held his breath and answered it, wondering what news the chief might have.
“This is Agent Tucker,” Jake said.
“Tucker, I need you down in my office. Now.”
Jake swallowed hard. “Everything okay, sir?”
“Just—get down here.”
CHAPTER THREE
Fiona leaned over the microscope, her focused gaze studying the forensic sample before her. The sterile white light cast a clinical glow over the lab as she and her colleagues worked diligently on their separate tasks. She could hear the soft hum of machines in the background, punctuated by the occasional beep or the scratch of a pen on paper.
"Look at this," she said, beckoning her colleague, Dr. Thompson, to join her. "The blood spatter pattern is inconsistent with a single gunshot wound."
Dr. Thompson's brow furrowed as he peered through the microscope. "You're right. It almost looks like there were two shots fired from different angles."
Fiona nodded, her mind already working through the implications. She scribbled notes in her ever-present notebook, her hand steady and precise despite the weight of exhaustion pressing down on her shoulders. She'd barely slept last night. Thoughts of Joslyn, of Jake, and her career had swept through her mind. Nightmares of finding Marissa's body in her cell had caused her to grow afraid to close her eyes--not that staying awake, remembering it all, had been any better.
But she was happy to be in the lab. After all that field work with Jake, she hadn't realized how much she'd missed working in the lab. She was in her element here. Of course, she still loved the thrill of being out there, getting her hands on a case and helping find a killer. Now, more than ever, she was determined to earn the title of agent--but it didn't hurt to spend some time in the lab sometimes, too. She didn't want to forget where she came from.
As she continued her analysis, Fiona's mind drifted back to Jake. She wondered how he was doing if he was thinking about her too. She couldn't forget the conversation they'd had in her apartment. As she worked, she went back to that night, only a few short weeks ago:
Fiona's thoughts swam as she sat on her couch, the night sky vibrant through the windows. Her body was cold, images of Marissa swirling around inside her head. She had just spent the night going through what had happened with Chief Whittaker and other personnel at the FBI, and it honestly didn't feel real. The way Marissa had been swinging, lifeless. The horrible realization that Fiona might never get the information that was inside her head, the information that had died along with her.
Now, she was frozen. She didn't want to call her parents, to tell them that her best lead had just perished.
She didn't even want to face it herself.
