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For the north might love me, but the rest of Aikyam does not.
Like a flower, love and loyalty needs to be nourished, and you can’t do that if you deprive it of sunlight. My kingdom has been deprived of their true ruler for years on end, never even having laid eyes on me until now. Even the gods have statues of themselves in their houses of worship so that their faithful disciples can look on and pray to them.
How can I expect blind loyalty when they don’t even know who they are being loyal to?
But the east knows Levi.
And it’s not too far a stretch to think that the south recognizes Teodoro and the west, Atlas.
To them, those are their true sovereigns.
I thought when I started this game of chess that the end goal was to conquer these defiant kings, but now I see the rot goes so much deeper than that. I need to win the love of the people, cradle them into my bosom, and demonstrate that I’ll never desert them again, if I’m ever able to be as beloved.
The mask that I had perfected so well will not serve me here.
Yes, I need to show strength, but not at the cost of their love.
Ice cannot melt hearts.
And though I felt a part of mine thaw last night, deep down I know it’s still rock solid. As hard as it always was. Too much has happened for me to be able to soften its hard edges with the snap of my fingers.
I’m too much like my father in that way. He too had a block of ice where a heart should lie. The only person I ever saw that could smooth off his rough glacier edges was my mother. After her death, though, his heart, like mine, turned into the coldest diamond rock.
Losing someone you love does that to a person.
I should know, since I lost everyone I cared about at the same time.
How is a heart even supposed to beat when there is no one to beat for?
Ice is the only true friend I have.
It never abandoned me.
It never died on me.
It always prevailed.
So yes… ice cannot melt hearts, but neither can it can’t break them.
It has only made mine stronger.
And with that thought in mind, I keep my chin up and school my facial features to their usual arctic form, uncaring of anything that is thrown my way.
When we reach the castle, we quickly dismount from our horse, Levi looking like he’d rather be anywhere than here.
“Levi?” I call out when he looks like he’s about to make a quick exit.
“I have matters to attend to,” he cuts me off, and then points at his general who is helping Inessa and Anya out of their carriage. “Brick will show you to your quarters.”
“Levi, don’t…” But words fail me.
What can I tell him that will change his mind as well as his somber state?
So instead of telling him not to leave me, that I don’t want to walk through his castle’s halls without him, I say nothing at all.
Levi stares at me for a tense-filled pause and then scowls before bowing his head.
When he lifts himself back up, he leans into me, to whisper his last humiliating taunt.
