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I had leaned against him last night, needing the comfort he so willingly gave me those days ago. He hadn't pushed nor asked questions; he just embraced me in silent understanding until I felt safe enough to drift off into oblivion.
Seeing that picture was like ripping a scab off an old wound; every agonizing second brought back memories of the killer's malicious acts. My eyes were crusted shut with his semen, and I used the salt from my tears to help break apart the crust that had formed on my eyes.
Hedelighted in torturing me, destroying me, and degrading me.
At first, I could do nothing but plead for it to end, but his perverse enjoyment only increased when my protests grew louder. To witness myself lying there, reduced to a battered and bruised figure, streaked with dried blood and completely exposed, raped, bleeding, and tortured, was unbearable. It made every fearful thought Dr. Larsen had unwound become real once more.
At the bottom of the picture was the wordmine, as though he were claiming me for himself, a reminder that he was waiting, lurking nearby like a spider in its web. He desired my fear and desperation to fuel him till he finally succeeded in subduing me - tearing apart my spirit bit by bit until I no longer had any strength left.
The past few weeks had been an emotional onslaught that had brought all of those dormant fears screaming back to life, this image only further confirming that he had never been caught and that he had been watching my every move.
Dread surrounded me.
What did he have planned? How long had he been here? Stalking me? Toying with me through these other women around me?
I knew it was only his desire for terror that drove him forward and kept him coming ever closer. But I refused to give into despair; I wouldn't let go of my life so quickly- it was time to stand up and fight.
Whatever that meant, I would fight back.
I would not let him drag me back into the abyss of fear.
He had taken enough of my life. I deserved to be free.
I stretch my arms above my head and pull myself out of the crook of James’ arm. He stirred at my movements and opened his eyes, giving me that boyish grin.
His blue eyes gleamed in the light with his classic boyish grin. “Good morning,” I said softly with an appreciative smile in his direction.
“Good morning, Ava,” his voice came out husky as he ran his fingers through his signature tousled brown hair. “How are you doing today?”
“A bit better. Thanks for not leaving me last night…” I blushed as shame set in.
How embarrassing that he had seen me in such a state - collapsed on the shower floor, naked. With unspoken understanding, he picked me up and put my bathrobe on me before carrying me to bed and tending to my needs until I fell asleep again.
He could sense my apprehension when I mentioned my therapist's opinion if she had seen what happened.
Clearing his throat, he sat up and held my eyes with fierce determination. “Ava, you have endured more than anyone ever should. You built this life for yourself and deserve nothing less than respect. Do not apologize for being human or feeling pain. This man will not win while I'm here, and you can't let him either.”
I slowly nod my head, unable to muster up a response to the words he had uttered. I feel his intense gaze scrutinizing me, and the close proximity of his body makes my heartbeat wildly in my chest. His presence invades my space, and I struggle for breath, feeling as if the air has been sucked away from around me.
"Do you normally stay overnight with the victims in your cases?" I blurt out impulsively, regretting it almost instantly when I see an amused sparkle in his eyes.
He moves closer towards me, close enough that I can smell the faint scent of his cologne and feel the warmth radiating from him.
"It's a first for me," he admits confidently, a smirk pulling at his lips. Before I can respond, he tucks a strand of hair behind my ear as his molten gaze lingers on my lips hungrily, as if he wants to say something.
In that split second, everything changes as James withdraws abruptly and takes several steps back. The sudden chill between us causes a shiver to run down my spine.
"This is a job, Ava," James states in an emotionless voice while averting his eyes away from mine. "You are nothing more than just another job to me."
His words crash into me like a wave of ice-cold water while tears threaten to fall from my eyes. My mouth hangs open in disbelief as bile rises in my throat and raging heat floods through my veins. I bite hard on my lip, trying to steady the tremble that threatens to crack through my voice as all the words I want to say die on my tongue. All that escapes my mouth is a single word.
"Wow."
James turns away and strides towards the door without another glance back at me.
"Everett and Sarah will take over escorting you from now on," he informs me coolly, leaving me standing there alone with shattered pieces of my heart strewn across the floor.
“Fuck you!” My words ricochet off the walls like lit gunpowder, and I can barely choke back my rage.
