AllFreeNovel
Share Us
I stare at her, jaw tight. I know the shock on my face says it all. It’s unfathomable that my mom would have a large hand in what happened between us… and the fact she has never said anything to me about it.
I lean forward on the table. “My Mom said all that?”
Her eyes flick down again, and I see the struggle in her eyes. I know it hurt her, but now she’s in a conundrum with the possibility of mom being seriously ill and outing her on a pretty major thing that happened between us.
Mom being ill doesn’t take away from the fact of what was done years ago… not by a long shot.
She nods eventually.
Our main course is served, but I don’t even know if I feel like eating my steak anymore. How did everything get so fucking complicated?
“She was looking out for your best interests,” she says, picking up her fork to take a bite of her pasta. “I do believe that, no matter how much it hurt me at the time.”
“I can’t fucking believe this.”
“I’m sorry,” she whispers. “I didn’t mean for you to find out like this.”
I stare across at her. “You should have told me, Emmerson. I don’t understand why you didn’t.”
I feel like getting up and walking out so I don’t blow a fuse in front of her.
“I thought I was doing the right thing. It was all so confusing; everyone kept talking about us failing. I didn’t know what to do. Then hearing you’d been thinking about breaking it off made me think some parts of what your Mom said could be true.”
“I was never going to break up with you,” I murmur. I clutch my hand on my thigh to try to compose myself. This is too fucking much.
She blinks over at me. I see the confusion in her face and the tears in her eyes.
“This breakup fucking cut me to pieces,” I tell her honestly. Because if not now, then when is she ever gonna know? “Just so you know.”
“It cut me too,” she whispers back. She doesn’t take my eyes off me as she puts her fork down. “Taylor, it was so difficult, my heart was shattered.”
“I thought you must have wanted to end it.”
She shakes her head. I didn’t realize anything about that time could make me feel worse, but now I know I’m wrong. She didn’t want to end things on her own accord, she did it for me!
“You should have talked to me,” I say again. It doesn’t matter how many times I say it, it’s not going to change anything. What’s done is done.
One thing is for sure, I need to speak to my mom pronto.
“Please don’t be mad at your Mom,” she says, like she can read my mind. I guess it probably isn’t too hard to guess at this point.
“You’re just saying that because of the illness thing,” I say. “Otherwise, I’m sure you wouldn’t have been so accommodating with her when she wanted to see you.”
“I wonder why she never told you.”
I shrug. Who knows with my mom. She isn’t exactly an open book. “I’ll get to the bottom of that.”
“Taylor, what’s done is done. I hate it too, I shouldn’t have listened to anyone. We can only move forward from this.”
I feel like punching something. This fucking sucks.
“So I’m supposed to forget all this, just like that?” I say through gritted teeth.
She picks up her fork again and starts eating in small bites. “Not just like that, but in time… maybe? I’m working on that myself, trust me.”
I swallow, and again, wish for a stronger drink than soda. I almost break my flawless ritual.
“She also apologized today for what happened back then,” she adds.
