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That tightness in my throat returned, and I closed my eyes against the moisture burning behind them.
It had been more years than I could count since I’d felt the hot sting of tears streaming down my cheeks, but as they started their descent, I gave up my fight against them. I lay in his arms, silently crying beside him. Crying for my lost youth. Crying for my lost dignity. Crying for the lost love I would have to endure as I realized now ... I could never let him see the real me. I could never let him behind the curtain, for once he peeked behind it, his love for me would fade as fast as my looks were. And the one thing harder than leaving him would be watching him leave me.
No. Being left by the one man I’d ever loved was something I knew I couldn’t endure. I wouldn’t survive it. I closed my eyes and squeezed out more hot tears as I realized what I had to do ... accept the only solution. Be the one to go. End this now before I lost any more of my dignity. Leave him before he realized who I truly was and left me.
Leaving my broken heart shattered into a million pieces in the bed beside my love, I slipped out from beneath his arm, quietly gathering my clothes and pausing at the door to look at him one last time.
“I love you, Alejandro,” I whispered before I walked out the door and out of his life forever.
With tears spilling down my cheeks, I rushed back to my room. After a quick shower, a quick fix of my hair, and applying enough makeup to go out in public, I rushed down the hall knocking on all the widows’ doors. One by one, they opened, each grinning widely when they saw me.
“There you are, you old hound dog!” Marge knocked me on the arm. “I didn’t hear you come home last night. I take it things went well.”
“I amdyingto hear! You have to tell us everything!” Sylvie practically bubbled out of her skin. “Did you say it? Please tell me you said it!”
“Oh, dear Lord, please let her have a ‘taken’ tag.” Doris squeezed her eyes shut.
I lifted my chin high, pushing down the agony threatening to tear me apart and pulling out the strength I’d used to carry me through all the years of my life before this. It had gotten me through many ups and downs, and though this felt like the lowest down I’d ever, or would ever, encounter, I knew I would make it through. “I have news.”
“You’re getting married!” Sylvie screamed, and the other girls whooped along with her.
I swallowed over the lump in my throat, forcing it back down. “No. I’m not getting married. I made some calls, and guess what? We’re getting off the ship and staying in Cozumel!” I faked my enthusiasm, hoping they would take the bait, but instead of whooping like they did before I dashed their hopes about my impending wedding, they just stood there, blinking.
“What?” Doris asked first. “I don’t understand. We still have to cruise back to the States.”
“I don’t get it.” Marge scrunched her brow. “Why are we getting off the ship here? Andcanwe get off the ship here? That doesn’t seem like a thing.”
“Of course, it’s a thing. It’s no different than flying to Mexico. As long as we have our passports, we’re fine. I checked this morning. People get left behind on cruises every day. We’re just choosing to get left behind. It’s going to be great. I booked us rooms already at the InterContinental. It’s the nicest hotel in Cozumel. We can stay there for a few days while we work out the next wish. It’s going to be great, ladies. Pure luxury all the way. So, pack your bags, and let’s get off the ship before it pulls out in an hour.”
I started to turn and head back to my room, but Sylvie grabbed my arm. “Whoa, there. Not so fast. What the hell is going on, Alice?”
“Nothing. Nothing is going on. We’re just getting off the ship. Now. That’s all.”
She tightened her grip. “Alice, I think we should just stay on the cruise, and let’s take some time to work things out with Alejandro. Whatever happened last night can’t be that bad. I’m sure you two can talk—”
“I want to get off the ship,” I spit out too fast and harshly. It was the only way to get the words out before my voice cracked with the tears threatening to come.
She stepped forward and softly said, “Did Alejandro do something? Did he not reciprocate your feelings? Did he—hurt you?”
The concern in her eyes was mirrored in Doris and Marge’s eyes too.
“If he hurt you, I swear to God, I’ll find myself a potato peeler and skin his balls one painful layer at a time,” Marge ground out, her little fist tightening with each word. “What the hell happened last night?”
I lifted my hands. “Okay. Now who’s Buffalo Bill? And no. He didn’t hurt me. Everything is fine, I promise. I’ve just decided this isn’t for me. And I want to get off the ship. Now.”
“Alice, are you sure?” Doris asked softly. “I don’t know what happened last night, but if you love him, I don’t think you should leave without trying to work things out. You should at least talk to him ... or something.”
Another wave of heartbreak tore through me, and this time, I couldn’t stop the tear it pushed out. “I need to get off this ship. Now. Please. I’m begging you all not to make me explain and not to fight me on this. You all promised you’d have my back. We need to go. Now.”
This time they didn’t fight, and when I wiped the tears from my eyes, I saw the concern in theirs.
“Of course, Alice. Of course,” Sylvie said quickly. “If you want off this ship, we’re off it. Now. Aren’t we girls?”
Marge crossed her arms. “I’ll swim you to shore myself if I have to. We’re outta here.”
“Anything for you, Alice,” Doris agreed quickly. “I’ll go pack my bags.”
“Thank you,” I breathed out. “I appreciate it. Just get your bags packed, and let’s go. I’m going to head down to the main level and wait for you there.” I didn’t want to risk a run-in with Alejandro coming to my room, so I knew I could hide out and avoid that.
