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"If we ever are," he said. "If this thing results in war, it could be years."
"All the more reason to ensure it doesn't end up in war," I said. "I personally have better things to do for the next few years. I'm sure you both do too."
"Things and people," Tavian agreed. "I plan to live at least as long as Ryze is old right now."
"You're not aspiring to much then," I said dryly. "My father was twice my current age when he died." When his time came, it was brief, if not sudden. One moment he was yelling at the servants, the next minute he closed his eyes and was gone. Leaving me, his only child, to inherit the court. Fortunately, by then, I'd had a couple of hundred years’ training. Stepping into the role was, perhaps not effortless, but more or less successful. Some would say more, some would say less.
"And several times as wise," Vayne said.
I drummed my fingers on my cheek. "Please remind me why I haven't replaced you yet?"
"Because no one is better equipped to be commander of your armies than I am," Vayne said immodestly. He sat back and crossed his knees, looking particularly smug, even for him.
"Ahhh. Remind me to keep an eye out for someone who is. Zared is promising. It might be worth considering—"
Vayne jerked forward, brow furrowed with annoyance. "The day a human takes over…" He finally realised I was joking and scowled at me. "You're an asshole."
I chuckled. "So I've heard. For the record, it's his inexperience, not the fact that he's human that rules him out of contention for that position. Coupled with the fact the Fae wouldn't willingly follow him."
They'd follow orders, but they wouldn't be happy about it. For people who lived a long time, we were reluctant to change. Perhaps Zared was the beginning of that. Allowing more humans into my court. Vayne's reaction was mild compared to many. That wasn't a fight I was willing to start right now.
I added that to the list of things to do when all of this was over. Or, at least, to consider.
"I'd follow him," Tavian said. "He can be abrasive and difficult, but he adores Khala. The way he helped me take care of her… He has softness down deep inside."
"Very deep," I said.
He was as pushy as any human I ever met, and more so than plenty of them. Not to mention possessive and aggressive. Traits I had myself, but I learnt to keep them in check. I had to work on that even more around Khala. She was pissed off with me enough as it was. I didn't want to drive her away completely.
Fortunately, I had time to wait and make her trust me again. And she would, even if it took me a hundred years to achieve. I've worked for things for longer than that. A hundred years was nothing.
No, I corrected myself. It wasn't nothing, it was a hundred of her heats. A hundred that she could spend with me or another alpha. In spite of assuring her I'd support her choice to find another, the idea of her fucking an alpha who wasn’t me made me want to rip his spine out with my bare hands.
"What is it between you and Zared?" I asked Tavian.
He looked surprised at the question. "I… He…" His throat bobbed up and down as he swallowed.
I sat up and rest a hand, palm outward. "I'm not jealous. No more than I am of your time with Khala. I'm merely curious. I don't want to see you get hurt." I had my moments of jealousy knowing Tavian and Khala were fucking each other, and seeing Tavian with Zared, but they were brief moments. I had no right to ask any of them to keep away from each other for my sake.
That was another sacrifice I made for the people I cared about.
"It's all right if I get hurt?" Vayne asked. He didn't sound offended.
I ignored him and kept my focus on Tavian. He looked relieved.
"I don't know," he admitted. "I care about him the same way I care about you and her." He cocked a head at Vayne. "Which is different to how I feel about you, because we're friends. Although if you wanted more, I—"
"I don't," Vayne said quickly. "I'm a part of this pack, but the only one I want to touch is her.”
Tavian nodded and looked back at me. "We're all bonded to her. Things could get complicated."
I rubbed the back of my head. "It certainly has the potential to get complicated. Be careful, for all our sakes. Especially Khala's. She's been through enough. This whole transition," I shook my head slowly, "has been difficult for her. I suspect it will be that way for a while. Sooner or later, she'll adjust and…"
"And?" Tavian asked.
"I don't know," I admitted. "I might not be able to begin to make it up to her."
"Which brings me back to saying you should have told her in the first place," Vayne said. "We might have avoided all of this."
