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“For someone who claims to not be romantic and expressive, you sure had no trouble helping him make it look easy.”
The sexy chuckle he released as he rubbed his hand over the waves in his hair went straight to my gut. It made me vibrate. Like fireflies in my belly.
“I’m not very sentimental, but with you, certain things just come easy.”
“Was I in love with him, or with you?”
Jerry’s tongue rolled across his cheek before he swallowed and looked away.
“Him.”
“Can we say that with certainty now? Because a lot of what made me love him romantically, I question if those things came from you.”
“All that matters now, is all that matters now.”
The featherlight kiss he placed on my shoulder and neck made me shiver. Jeremiah stood and headed back inside, and I didn’t realize I was holding my breath until he closed the door and it released.
16
That Night
It was true.
Well, I knew it was true because Jeremiah had never lied to me a day in his life. Still, I had to ask Nova to be sure, and he confirmed it. I laughed from my gut. Thinking back over our entire relationship, I questioned if anything Nova did for me romantically was his own doing. I wasn’t upset with him; I actually respected him for doing what Jeremiah suggested. I was upset with Jeremiah. Because the truth was, all this time, I never allowed myself to consider Jeremiah as a romantic partner for two reasons—because of our friendship, and because he wasn’t my type romantically.
I took great pride in being one of the few people he opened up to. Because of that, I could never greedily ask for more. Now, I wondered if he would have made a good lover for me, seeing as so many of the things Nova did that I loved came from him.
My feet seemed to have a mind of their own, taking me from the guest room to Jeremiah’s bedroom. Well, maybe they were connected to my heart while my mind wanted them to stay in bed. I knocked on his door, and after he told me to enter, I opened it. Not going in fully, I leaned against the doorframe and stared at him.
He looked so damn sexy with his beautiful brown skin against white sheets. Slumped down slightly, his comforter was just under his naked chest. As always, three gold chains were around his neck.
I enjoyed designing his home. His home theater and bedroom were admittedly my favorites. A true bachelor, his bedroom had recliners for relaxing, a large TV with an electric fireplace underneath, and the same mood lighting I used in my office. The fireplace was used mostly for ambiance and not heat, because he had a standing fan and his ceiling fan going to make sure the room stayed cool.
“You good?” he checked.
“No.”
“What’s wrong?”
“When you say you love me… what do you mean?” His mouth opened but nothing came out. He’d been very careful with his words today. “How do you, how do you love me, Jerry?”
He sat up in bed with a shake of his head. “I don’t think this is a conversation we should have.”
“Why not?”
“My answer has the power to change things between us, and I don’t believe either of us would be ready for that.”
Oh.
Okay.
For a normal person, that would have been enough.
Not me.
Not the glutton for punishment.
“I still want to know.”
