AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Gabe nodded slowly. “Yeah, okay. I get it.”
Tony stood. “Now get out of here, you two, and go catch up. I’ll call you when your laptop is ready.”
I looked over at Gabe. “You hungry?”
He shrugged. “I could eat.”
I stood and headed for the door. “I know this great place around the corner. The burgers are huge.”
The pub wasn’t too crowded since the lunch rush was over. Gabe and I got a lot of stares as we walked in, probably because we were both pretty big guys. That and Gabe still had his high and tight military haircut. Mine was short, but not military short anymore. After the server took our order, I leaned back in my chair and asked, “So, what really happened?”
Gabriel sighed. “It wasn’t the same after you and Terry were gone. And I think the commander never forgave me for blaming him for the screw-up that killed Benji. I did my duty. I finished the missions I was given and never left a man behind.” He shook his head. “But my heart wasn’t in it anymore. I didn’t one hundred percent trust Commander Grayson, and he knew it. I think he was happy to see me go.”
I shook my head. “Man, that sucks. I’m sorry it turned out that way. I know how much you loved it.”
He shrugged. “Not as much as you did. Or Terry.” A shadow crossed his face, and he reached across the table and squeezed my hand. “I’m real sorry about Terry. I wish I had been here for you.”
I covered his hand with my own. “Thanks,” I said through a lump in my throat. “He was never the same after his injury. He couldn’t handle not being a SEAL anymore. I tried to get him into other work, but it was all or nothing with him.” I swallowed hard and my eyes burned. “In the end, I wasn’t enough for him to want to stay.”
We both sat back when the server came over with our beers. Gabriel took a big swig and then looked at me. “I was in BUD/S with Terry. I think he told you that.” I nodded. “We all had that fire in our gut, but Terry was next level. He was intense. There was no way he was going to fail.”
“Yeah,” I said. “It was one of the things I loved about him. He put his all into everything he did.”
“Yeah,” Gabriel agreed. “But during Hell Week, he was even more over the top than usual. You know what it’s like—five and a half days with only four hours of sleep. He went on and on about how he was going to show his parents what kind of man he was. He was almost out of his mind with how determined he was to prove himself to them.” Gabe shook his head. “I don’t know why he cared so much. From what I could tell, they were useless pieces of shit.”
“They were,” I agreed. “They didn’t even come to his funeral. But they sure as hell had their hands out when they found out he made me the beneficiary of his life insurance policy.”
Gabe made a sound of derision. “I’ll just bet. I assume they left empty-handed.”
I snorted. “Yeah. And with an earful of what I thought about them. Then I sicced my brother, Santino, on them. He’s a lawyer. They didn’t dare come after me again.”
Our food arrived, and we dug into the big juicy burgers. We were both quiet while we ate, but I could tell Gabe had something else he wanted to say to me. Finally, I said, “Spit it out, Gabe.”
My friend smirked at me. “You always did know when people had something to say.”
“It comes from having six siblings,” I replied.
He took another drink from his beer. “Terry loved you. More than almost anything else in the world, he loved you and wanted to make you happy.”
“It seems like there’s a ‘but’ in there somewhere,” I said.
Gabe blew out a breath. “He loved being a SEAL most of all. He couldn’t imagine his life without it. He and I got talking when you were on an op without him. He was worried about what would happen to you as a couple if you decided to retire.”
I felt a sick twist in my gut. I pushed my plate away, my appetite gone. “He never told me any of this,” I said gruffly.
“I know.” Gabriel shook his head. “I told him he should say something to you, but he wasn’t very good at talking about stuff like that.”
“To me,” I muttered.
“Nah, man, it wasn’t like that.” He leaned forward in his chair. “I’m pretty sure Terry only told me all that because he was drunk and worried about you being on an op without him. I just think he could never let go of his parents’ definition of what a man should be.”
I scrubbed my face with my hands. “Why are you telling me all this?”
“Because I get the impression that you blame yourself for what happened. For what he did. And you shouldn’t. I don’t think there was anything you could have done to change it.”
Tears stung the backs of my eyes. “Fuck. That shit messed me up more than anything that happened when we were deployed.”
Something like pain clouded his eyes for a moment. “The people you love are the ones who hurt you the most.”
