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Leo
“CAPTAIN, THE GUYS AREall taking bets on whether or not you’re in love or just getting laid.”
I look up at the open door. “Neither, asshole,” I tell Jenkins as he enters my office and closes the door behind him. “Don’t you have something to clean?”
“C’mon, man. You can tell me.” Despite my glare, he picks up a chair across from my desk and turns it around so he can sit on it backwards. “You’re not as grouchy these days, but we never see you with anyone. We even had a rookie follow you home the other night thinking we could catch you at something. You went in the house and stayed there until the next day.”
“Jesus. If you guys have that much extra time, I need to schedule some more drills.”
Jenkins is like family to me, and I’ve given him plenty of advice over the years. I’ve just never asked for any. Maybe that’s part of my problem. I’m closed off too much. Spending so much time with Dixie has shown me where I block people instead of letting them in. I’m sure my sisters agree. They’re always trying to get me to open up more.
I don’t know how to start though. What if I didn’t ask for advice? Just casually put it out there and see what prevailing guy-wisdom Jenkins could offer. I look at the report on my screen, pretending to be distracted. “Maybe I have an internet girlfriend.”
Jenkins side-eyes me, trying to figure out if I’m bullshitting him. “Where does she live?”
“I don’t know.”
“Did you meet her on a dating site?”
I roll my eyes at him. “We both know I couldn’t navigate a dating site. I’d end up on that one Drew uses and find myself dating a gay biker named Axe.”
Jenkins laughs. “Drew doesn’t use that site anymore. Not since he hit it off with the UPS guy.”
“No kidding.” I never thought Drew would pair off. I feel even more pathetic now. It’s not that I never wanted to get married and have kids, I just never met anyone who made me want to. “So I’m the last single?”
“I guess that depends on this internet girlfriend you maybe have.”
I sit back in my chair. “I didn’t use a dating site. I don’t have an internet girlfriend.”
“But you do have a girlfriend.”
“I have...I don’t know what you’d call it. It’s a phone thing.”
“A phone thing.”
“Yeah.”
“But it’s not serious.”
“I don’t know what it is.”
“Cap, you don’t even know where she lives. Are you sure you’re not dating a dude living in his mother’s basement?”
“She sounds like a woman.” God, I love her voice. I love it when she moans my name when she comes. I love it when she laughs. I love it when she tells me about the day she thinks will bore me. “And I’ve seen...enough of her to know she’s a woman.”
“You have titty pics?”
“Jesus. Are you twelve? You’re a married man, for God’s sake.”
“I didn’t ask to see the pics. Just wondered if you had them.”
I do. I so fucking do. I have several in fact. She’s got amazing breasts.
“Wait. Cap, does she have dick pics of you?”
I rub my eyes wearily. Maybe if I don’t answer...
“She does! Wow. Nobody even came up with that one in the pool.”
