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Bo stretches the leash to sniff at Fifi, and Nash pulls her up off the floor protectively. “Back off, buddy.”
“He won’t hurt her. They were both wagging their tails. Put her down. You’ll see.”
It pains him, but he puts Fifi back down, letting the dogs get to know each other some more. “Fifi is only here temporarily. What will I do with a dog when they go?”
He almost spits the wordtheyout.
Stella’s gaze catches mine for confirmation and I nod. Stella bites her lip, thinking how to spin this now. “Could you at least take him until I find another home for him?”
“How stupid do you think I am, woman?”
“You don’t really want me to answer that, do you?”
The mailman comes in with my package, thank you Prime, and it distracts Grumpy McGrumperson long enough for Stella to “have to run,” leaving Nash with a new dog and a promise to call later.
He rounds on me. “I thought we agreed no purchases without discussing them first.”
I take a deep breath, not understanding why he keeps trying to draw me into fights with him. “I’m sorry you’re upset with Stella, but please don’t take it out on me.”
He pulls out a pocket knife and takes the box off the counter. “What is it this time?” he asks.
I try to snatch the package. “It’s mine.”
He’s got it open before I can get it back, telling me all about how he likes the way the bar is now, it looks just fine, and I have no right to just come in and turn his life upside down and now he has two dogs...and then all the color leaves his face when he pulls out a long box with a purple penis on it.
He brings his eyes to mine and our gazes catch for a long moment when time slides into another reality briefly. He blinks once. Twice.
I cross my arms over my chest. “It’s not for the bar. It’s for my vagina. And if you’d be so good as to put it back in the box, I’d appreciate it.”
“You bought a dildo?”
I snatch it from him and lower my voice so...well, there’s no one in the bar to overhear, but I do it anyway. “Yes.”
“Why?”
“You don’t really want me to answer that, do you?” He just blinks at me some more. Waiting. “We’ve established that I’m not frigid.Youdon’t seem to want to continue what we started, and you appeared jealous when I suggested that maybe I find another lover—”
“I don’t get jealous,” he interrupts, his jaw so tight I can hear his teeth grinding.
“Yes, all right. Anyway, I thought it best not to let the pipes freeze back up. Stella recommended this model to me...why are you recoiling in horror?”
“Stella has a purple...one of those?” He gestures to the box in my hand.
“Well, actually, I don’t know what color hers is. I thought purple was kind of whimsical, so I—”
“Whimsical?”
“Why do you even care? You have made your position very clear. You are counting the days until I leave and you don’t want me to insinuate myself into your life any more than I already have. I thought I was being very mature by not flaunting finding another paramour under your nose.”
“What’s a paramour?”
It’s a very good thing I don’t carry a small knife in my pocket the way he does. That’s all I’m saying. “Do not make fun of the way I talk. You know very well what a paramour is. I’m going to go put this away upstairs and then I am going to meet Pauline for lunch. If we’re done here, of course.”
His tense jaw squares even more. “Yes, we are done here.”
“Wonderful. Would you like me to take Fifi or leave her here to keep Bo occupied while I’m gone?”
He picks up a towel and a glass, his go-to activity when he’s thinking. “Just leave her.”
