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There is no space. We’re wedged in too tight.
“Everything okay?” Rowdy asks from the other side of the tent, voice thick with sleep.
“Panic attack,” Ryder tells him. “It’s fine.”
It’s not fine.
My skin continues to crawl, but I ache for Ryder’s closeness. It’s a double-edged sword. Either way, I hurt.
Ryder twists until his back is to mine. I instantly regret driving him away. With some wriggling, I manage to turn to my other side. My arm slides around him and I hug him to me, inhaling his scent.
“This is better,” I murmur. “I don’t feel trapped.”
He relaxes before slipping his hand over mine. It feels so natural to let him comfort me, but would he be so accommodating if he knew what I did with our sister? I’m desperate to tell him we had sex and get it off my chest. I thought I could forget or shove it from my mind, but it feels like a betrayal keeping it from him.
“Hey, Ryder,” I whisper, my words tickling softly over his ear. “I have to tell you something.”
My whole body trembles as I worry how he’ll take the news.
“I know.”
He knows?
How could he possibly know?
“Rae told me,” he says, answering my unspoken questions. He turns his head slightly to where our mouths are so close. “You gave her a gift. I’d have done the same too.”
Relief floods through me knowing he’s not angry and understands the mental hell we went through to drive us to that point. Our fingers thread together and I’m able to fall back asleep feeling much lighter than when I first woke up.
I wake to a hand covering my mouth. Panic claws its way up my throat, preparing to let loose a scream, but in the early dawn light, I realize it’s Ryder.
Just Ryder.
He pulls his hand away and brings a finger to his lips before handing me his rifle. I take it from him and follow him out of the tent. The girls are still both asleep, but Rowdy’s missing. Clearly, they heard something and we need to check it out.
What did they hear?
Is Logan here?
The panic seizes my lungs again, but I force myself to slowly breathe. It’s probably just a bear or something. I can’t allow Logan to terrorize me when he’s not even here.
Once outside, I scan the dim forest along the top of the hills surrounding us. I don’t see anything, but that doesn’t mean there’s no threat. Rowdy begins climbing one hill, way ahead of us. Ryder motions for me to guard the tent while he heads in a different direction.
My heart thunders in my chest, making my head throb in the same rapid cadence. I’ve had a nonstop headache since Logan beat the shit out of me and it’s getting old. I just want every reminder of Logan to go away.
Rowdy crests his hill first and then disappears. Ryder scales his hill not too long after.
I’m alone, charged with keeping the girls safe.
Dread consumes me. I wasn’t able to keep them safe before, so why in the hell does Ryder trust me to do it again? My attention jerks back and forth between the spots I’d last seen each of my brothers. Nothing. Silence.
A sound comes from the tent. I swivel around to see if Kristen or Destiny are coming out. No one exits the tent.
It’s then I see the dark form standing behind it.
I blink several times to make sure I’m not hallucinating. When the shadow moves, fear paralyzes me. It charges for me with a low growl. My attempt to raise the rifle is thwarted when the beast tackles me.
The beast from my nightmares.
