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“Nope. That will not do it this time,” my older brother says, shaking his head. “You’re not here today. At all. Is everything okay with you?”
No. I’m plagued by thoughts of what might have been, like bending Autumn Sherwood over my desk. “I’m fine. Just need some more sleep.”
He purses his lips the way he does when he’s thinking. One of the many reasons I used to love playing poker with him. The man has tells for days. “Do you need some coffee? Tea? Red Bull? We’ve got a lot to catch up on with this Worker’s Comp thing.”
“I’ll be right back.” I pop into the kitchen of the restaurant and grab a Red Bull before returning to his office.
“Chug it, Rowan, and let’s get back to it.”
He’s right, so I knock it back and we jump back in. By eight, though, Sawyer is dragging ass. I tease, “You’ve yawned for five minutes straight. Need a Red Bull for you, too? Willow keeping you up every night before the wedding, huh?”
He glares. “Hasn’t been five minutes—
“No, it’s been ten minutes of yawning, but I was being generous.”
He shoots me a glare and gives up. “I keep reading the same clause over and over, and it’s still gibberish. Red Bull isn’t going to fix that. We might as well call it a night and start fresh in the morning.”
“Sounds good.” I pack up my laptop, happy to be going home. It’s not as if I can concentrate with thoughts of Autumn in my head. “See you tomorrow.”
“See ya.”
On the drive home, I drum my fingers to the beat of the radio. It’s all I can do not to tap my feet, as well. I step on the accelerator instead.
The kids are half asleep on Hanna again, both fighting sleep. She shrugs. “I tried to get them to bed, but they were feeling feisty tonight. So I put on Planet Earth for them, and now, you have zombies.”
Jonah murmurs, “Zombies aren’t real.”
I scoop him up first this time. “Time for bed.”
“I’m not tired,” he slurs.
“I know, but try anyway.”
“’kay.”
After I tuck him in, I wait for the light at the bottom of his door. Either he’s asleep or he’s gotten sneakier about the light.
Then it’s Ellie’s turn, and she snores over my shoulder until I tuck her into bed. But when I leave, she yawns and asks me to read her a story. “Of course, sweetie.” She’s asleep before page eight.
As I turn out the light, she asks in her sleepy little girl voice, “Is Hannah our new mom?”
Rip my heart out, why don’t you? “No, sweetie. She’s just going to be your babysitter. Nobody could ever replace your mom, you know that. But do you think you would you be okay with having a stepmom one day?”
“Yeah, but not Hannah.”
“How come?”
“She makes me brush my teeth.”
I smile and try not to laugh. “I’ll make you a deal, okay?”
“What deal?”
“You only have to brush the teeth you want to keep.”
She frowns. “What if I want new teeth?”
Okay, it was not as clever as I thought.“I take back the deal. Always brush your teeth.”
