Page 83 of Had to Be You


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Knox leaned back against the countertop as casual as can be and crossed his arms. “What’s not easy for you?”

“This.” Laura waved her hand. “Me. Apologizing.”

The corner of his lip twitched. “Is that what you’re doing?”

“It’s what I’m trying to do.”

He nodded and waited. She could see amusement dancing in his dreamy, milk-chocolate gaze and as badly as she wanted to melt in his stare, she forced herself to continue speaking.

“I’m sorry that I freaked out the other morning. I shouldn’t have treated you like that. I would blame it on the lack of sleep, but I don’t like it when people make excuses for their behavior. You saved me with the kids. Seriously, you were my hero and I just…I shouldn’t have kicked you out and treated you like that."

Knox was quiet for a moment and Laura thought he was waiting for her to continue talking. But that was it. In the world of apologies that had been huge for her. But it seemed that apologizing was easier than saying what she’d actually came here to say, which is that she loved him and that’s why they couldn’t see each other anymore.

She’d rather apologize a million times than admit that.

“I’m sorry, too. I crossed the line by silencing your phone. I had no right to do that.”

It was clear to Laura that apologizing was just as hard for Knox as it was for her. It made sense because they were both strong-willed people who were intentional in their actions and speech. It was something that they’d both scored highly on in the questionnaire they’d taken for the speed dating event.

“Thank you, for saying that. But I do know that you were just trying to help. You knew that I needed sleep and I mean, I yelled at a man making me chocolate chip pancakes. That is wrong for so many reasons.”

He grinned but she could see and feel that the energy between them was different now. Her assessment might just be paranoia, but she didn’t think it was. There was a distance between them that had never existed before. Knox had a wall up.

She didn’t blame him, and it was probably for the best. Nothing could happen between them. There was no future. His guard being up should make it easier for her to leave, but she found herself wanting to scale the wall that he’d erected or kick it down.

Laura may not be in therapy like Kennedy but she’d invested a lot of time and money into self-help books so she could be the best version of herself, but even without logging those countless hours for self-improvement she would know that her response to him pulling back was not healthy.

Knox brought out a side of her that she didn’t even know she had. A reckless side. A throw caution to the wind side. An act now think about the consequences later side.

It was unnerving yet undeniably enticing.

“How are the kiddos doing?” He crossed his arms as he leaned against the counter. “Did anyone come down with anything?”

Even though she knew that he might just be making small talk, the fact that he asked about her nieces and nephews caused her inner Scarlett O’Hara to swoon. Why did he have to be so perfect? Well, almost perfect.

“Nope, no one else came down with anything.”

“Oh, good. That’s good.” Knox nodded.

Unhealthy or not, the fact that he was clearly more distant than he’d ever been with her was driving her crazy. She knew that it was ridiculous but she wanted to feel the connection that they’d always had, from the first time they’d met. The thought that she’d done something to destroy that was eating her up inside.

She cleared her throat. “They miss you. You areallthey’ve been talking about.”

Knox grinned and looked down to the ground. When he lifted his head again, there was an intensity in his stare that hadn’t been there a second before. His eyes pinned Laura in place as he asked, “What about you? Have you missed me?”

Ding, ding, ding. We have a winner. The connection was back, and Laura could not be more relieved.

Internally she was doing the happy dance as she decided how she should respond to his question. She could lie. She could deny that she’d been thinking about him every second of every day. That from the moment she opened her eyes until she closed them to go to bed, he was like a constant running ticker tape through her brain.

But what was the point?

“Yes. I’ve missed you,” she admitted.

“How much?” he asked.

The gravelly tone in his voice caused Laura’s inner walls to spasm.

She swallowed over a large lump that had just formed in her throat. “A lot.”

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