AllFreeNovel
Share Us
He frowns. “I’m not following.”
I raise both hands in the air, unable to contain the energy surging through my body at my sudden idea. “What if you baptized me not as a Christian, but as an atheist?”
He looks at me for a prolonged moment. “I don’t think it’s a ritual atheists usually take part in.”
“Itshouldbe for atheists like me. We were raised with rituals and symbolism. It will be committing my life to atheism, the same way I pretended to commit it to Christ when I was a kid. I’m having a hard time accepting myself. Maybe a ritual would help.”
He sighs. “Will you be disappointed if it doesn’t?”
“No,” I say quickly. “I promise. I just want to try it.”
He sighs. “Your dad would kill me if he knew. This is not what he meant when he asked me to help you.”
I roll my eyes. “It wasn’t his place to ask you.”
“Don’t think I don’t know that, but I still agreed.”
“Stop being a pushover.”
He narrows his eyes, his lips quirking. “Do you want me to help you or not, young lady?”
My stomach clenches. “Yes, Pastor.” I’m surprised how light my voice sounds. “I just want you to stop acting on behalf of my dad.”
He’s quiet for a moment, but then he leans forward. The smile that overtakes his face sends arrows of heat straight to my groin. It’s a wicked smile. There’s no other way to describe it.
It’s the smile he used to give women in his kinky past.
“I’m a man of the cloth, young lady. I don’t answer to your dad. I don’t answer to anyone but God.”
“Does that mean you’ll do it?” I nearly shout.
He leans back into his seat. “If it’ll really help you.”
When I squeal, his smile grows. “We usually do it in the ocean at New Morning. I could find a time on my schedule, maybe this week or—”
“Why not right now?”
His eyes widen.
I gesture at the restaurant patio deck, which has an expansive view of the ocean. “It’ll probably be sunset by the time we’re out in the water. What a perfect symbol. My faith in God will leave with the sun. I’ve never been afraid of darkness.”
He looks at me for a prolonged time, and my heart thumps as I try to read his thoughts. The corner of his lips are slightly lifted, and there are creases at the corners of his eyes. Something about this look makes heat shoot into my groin.
“We won’t have time to get swimsuits,” he finally says, and I know I’ve won.
“I don’t want one.” My voice is shaky in my giddiness. “I wore an oversized T-shirt the first time. My mom thought a bathing suit was too immodest.”
He glances out at the water. “You’re going to freeze when we get out there.”
I nod once. “A symbol of how uncomfortable it is to embrace who you really are. The cold will be worth it, like you said.”
“You are something else, Mariana.” He’s almost grinning now. “Alright. You’ve convinced me.”
I shriek as he pulls out several bills from his wallet and sets them on the table. “Let’s do it.”
A short while later, we’re standing with bare feet at the edge of the water. As the waves lap gently at the shore, I let the melody of the ocean wash over me.
This is right.
