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I won’t let her dismiss me.
“I don’t want you to fuck over your relationship with Brandon,” I lie, “because you’re still hung up on Finn.”
She rolls her eyes as she gulps down a bottle of water. “I would never do that,” she says breathlessly as she lowers the bottle. “But I can’t help that my heart is still in pain.”
I grit my teeth. I know I should feel compassion. I did, for so long. It was a disgusting thing that Finn did.
But it’s been three years.
And why doesn’t she have any pain in her heart for what she and I lost? Finn left her, but I’m right here, damn it. And I was right about him. How does she not see it?
She blames me for everything that went wrong between them, just like Brandon said. I saw it coming, and she superstitiously considers me the cause.
I thought our bond was stronger than this. Finding out that it wasn’t is a physical pain in my chest. I miss my big sister.
Maybe the person I thought she was never existed.
ChapterTwelve
Brandon
Mariana drops to her knees and reaches for my hips. I glance down and see my own bare thighs. Why am I naked?
There’s no resisting her now. I’d have to be a saint. I’ll just give in. God will forgive me.
She smiles cheekily before leaning forward and slipping that beautiful mouth around my cock.
“Naughty girl,” I whisper.
Unbearable pleasure rushes through my gut with the force of a deluge, my heart pounding like a hammer. My office blurs, morphing into a dark room. The feel of Mari’s hot mouth becomes my hard, dry fist.
Fuck.
I shouldn’t be this disappointed. I always wake up when it gets to be too much. When her sweetness makes me so wild, I can no longer hold on to the ghostly hand of sleep.
I grit my teeth. I won’t jack off. I won’t do it.
Dreams are involuntary, but masturbating isn’t. Sure, God would forgive me. I’m already halfway to ecstasy. But I couldn’t forgive myself. Indulging lust only makes it more potent, and I have to stop fantasizing about the young woman who sees me as a mentor.
After a deep, steadying breath, I step out of bed. I’ll just have to start my day early. Staying in bed will only be a temptation.
Hours later, I’m in the church auditorium. The real-life Mariana stretches one long arm up to the top of the corkboard, and a swath of brown skin on her lower back is exposed.
She has beautiful skin that looks so, so soft.
“What do you think?” Gurshan asks.
When my head jerks up, he’s smirking at me. His gaze shoots to Mariana, then back to me.
Fuck. It’s all over his expression that he knows exactly what I was looking at.
I haven’t been able to stop. After that dream, I’ve been sensitive to her every movement.
It doesn’t make any sense. It wasn’t my first dream about her. I’ve been having them for weeks now.
Naughty girl.I desperately want to say those words to her. I want her to behave like such a bad girl that I lose my power to resist her. Then I want to bend her over my lap and spank her for it.
Fuck. Gurshan just said something.
