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A crash downstairs jolts me awake, which wakes Lily. I whisper, “Stay here, I—
“Dad!” Aiden hollers, sing-song up the stairs. “Can I have cereal?”
Relief hits like a truck. Not a burglar. Then I realize the real threat. The kids could see her in my bed. I yank my sweatpants up and tell her, “I’ll do my morning routine with the kids and—
“After you go, I’ll see myself out.”
But I shake my head. “Please don’t.”
“How come?”
“I’m calling in to work. I want to spend today with you. If you don’t have anything else—
“I don’t.”
“Good. Okay. Let me take care of them, and I’ll be back soon.”
She yawns and buries her face into the pillows, as I pull a tee shirt on and run out the door. The crash turned out to be a bowl that shattered upon impact with my floors. A teary-eyed Franny is picking up shards, and I lurch forward to snatch it from her. “I’ve got it, sweetie.”
“I didn’t mean to—
“Of course not. It’s okay.”
Her little sniffles rip my heart out. “Aiden was hungry. I wanted to make him cereal.”
He puts his arm on her shoulders. “I’ll be okay, Franny. I’m not that hungry.”
But she keeps sniffling anyway.
After sweeping up the pieces and checking half a dozen times for anything I missed, I let her back into the kitchen. “You want to help me make cereal?”
She bobs her head. “He had a bad dream, and I wanted to make him feel better.”
“You had a bad dream, buddy?”
He shrugs as he pulls up a seat at the kitchen bar. “I was in a big scary castle and I kept hearing screaming. It was weird.”
God, please do not tell me he heard me and Lily and that we were not the cause of his nightmare last night.“Thatisweird. Rice crispies or cheerios?”
“Cheerios, please.”
After getting them fed and clothed, I race upstairs to dress like I was going to work. If I didn’t, they would want to stay home, too, and I need to have the talk with Lily. As I dress, I hear her light snores, and I can’t stop smiling.
I kiss her forehead on the way out and dash out the door with the kids just in time. Crisis averted, no burglar, no injuries, no one knows anything—
“Dad, why is Lily’s car still here?” Franny asks.
Shit. “She had a friend pick her up. Car trouble.” Wow, two lies in under ten seconds. That has to be a record.
“Oh.”
Thank god, that’s where she leaves it. On the way to school, all I can think about is how much last night means to me and what our steps should be going forward. It’s a sticky situation to be in, all things considered. I have left myself vulnerable to many problems, not to mention the snark of my family.
I can hear it now. “Couldn’t find anyone, so youhiredsomeone?” But the truth is, I don’t give a fuck. Let them talk. The only people whose opinions matter are me, Lily, Aiden, and Franny. And Abigail, considering she’s the one who hired her. That might be a little awkward at first, but she is a reasonable person.
Dropping the kids off, I give a wave to their teacher as I unbuckle their seats. Once they are with her, I smile and drive off. I’m too in my head to make conversation right now.
This thing between me and Lily cannot be a onetime situation. I want more. There is no way for me to go back to a strictly professional, or even a friendly relationship. I had tried to kid myself into believing that would work, but it was never going to. There is just too much here between us.
