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His fingers gently dig into my flesh, and suddenly, I feel his lips pressing against mine. I close my eyes because it feels like the right thing to do and stay frozen in place. A warm sensation fills my chest, but there’s also this tiny hint of guilt.
If my mom ever finds out...
That thought makes me drop the notebook from my fingers.
The noise makes Samael jolt, and he takes a couple of steps toward the entrance stone, turning his back on me. I gaze at his messy hair and nervously bite my lip, feeling the heat rush back to my chest in bubbly waves of pure excitement.
His lips were right there earlier.
The warmth, his soft lips, and his hands on my knees make my heart flutter with happiness. I reach out and pluck a leaf from his hair. He senses it and shoots a curious look over his shoulder. I catch him blushing, his expression turning into something comical. We lock eyes, and I’m completely entranced, holding the leaf in my hand. His full lips part slightly, but his words are cut off by distant footsteps that echo through the cold stone walls of the cave.
“Wait, you guys were here this whole time?!” Manasseh’s voice breaks the spell of the moment as he rushes into the cave, with Uriel trailing behind.
I see Samael’s expression instantly shift and become serious. Manasseh is Samael’s twin, but they look nothing alike.
They’re so different. They have totally different personalities, but they still have some common traits with their dad, and they both have big, wide hands, but Sami’s are more bony while Manasseh’s are meatier. Then there are their eyes. Manasseh’s eye shape closely resembled Mr. Dan’s, but his blue eyes possessed a clarity akin to his mother Anabelle’s or even mine. In contrast, Samael had gray eyes with dark reflections, adding an intense allure to his gaze.
And let’s not forget how good-looking the Morgenstern brothers are, and Uriel is just as amazing, a perfect blend of their dark-haired, black-eyed dad and their blonde, blue-eyed mom. Oh, and one more thing, both twins are pretty tall, but Sami takes the crown for being the tallest among them all.
The four of us have been friends ever since we were young. Manasseh, in a way, assumes the role of our captain. Being the oldest, it’s natural that we all follow his lead, even if we don’t always agree with him. But no one dares to challenge him. He’s got this kind of commanding presence, and somehow he manages to have a big say in our crew, even though most of the time his influence ends up being negative, according to my mom who’s not his biggest fan.
Their parents are also our neighbors, so it was inevitable that we would play together from a young age. I still remember the first time I met them. Their mom invited me over because she couldn’t get them to get along, hoping that introducing someone new might drastically change things. And it did, actually. In the beginning, my mom and I would visit them every weekend. The moms would sit on the back terrace, sipping coffee and talking about random stuff, while we could play freely. And as a result, we started spending more and more time together. Back then, the boys were into collecting Pokémon cards and had sticker albums, and their toy chest was filled with cars. But I wasn’t into cars, so after the first visit where Ireluctantly played “The Garage” I started bringing my dolls from home.
That’s what their dumb boys’ game was called: “The Garage”. Obviously, it involved cars and car races. The only one who wanted to play with me and my dolls was Samael, while Manasseh stubbornly ran them over with his stupid remote-controlled car, leaving me to go home in tears after he decapitated all of them.
But they didn’t want to let me go home upset. So Sami and Uriel teamed up, playing the role of cops, determined to catch their wicked brother, the Barbie doll slayer.
As time went on, I started collecting stickers too, and I even joined in playing with Masse’s remote-controlled car, which I threw into the pool the first chance I got my hands on the remote. I had been plotting that revenge for way too long not to put my plan into action.
We somehow managed to stay good friends throughout our childhood years.
But then, one day, things took a dark turn during our playtime, and my mom forbade me from visiting them ever again.
It was a scorching summer day, and we gathered in the backyard of their house. Manasseh came up with this dumb idea to turn their dad’s wine barrels into mini pools. Mr. Dan enjoyed making wine in the traditional Romanian way, so during the summer, he would fill barrels with water and cover them up. The wooden barrels were enormous, and when they removed the lids, the water inside was warm and inviting, so it wasn’t hard to convince me to join them. The boys started playing around the barrels, bringing in some chairs as makeshift steps to reach the brimming pools of warm water. I remember sitting on the edge of one barrel, dipping my feet into the soothing warmth. The weather was unexpectedly hot for Matlock’s climate, and it felt incredible. As I chilled with my feet in the water, out of nowhere, Manasseh thought it would be hilarious to shove me into the barrel. Before I could even process what was happening, I had been submerged several times. The unpleasant sensation of water invading my nose, ears, and mouth started to make me dizzy as I struggled to get out of the barrel, until eventually, I grew tired. Someone leaped into action, pulling me out onto the edge, but I swallowed too much water and I still felt like I couldn’t breathe. Just as I was about to black out, I caught a glimpse of Samael above me. It felt like he was some guardian angel sent to rescue me, and with that thought, everything went dark, only to awaken later in a hospital bed.
That was the day I fell in love with Samael Morgenstern. I had always known the feelings I had for him, but I was too young back then to give them a name. As I got older, I realized it was straight-up love.
Samael is like the embodiment of all my intense emotions, which eventually turned into full-blown love.
So, I will never forget that day, which remains ingrained in my mind as “the day I fell in love with Samael,” not as “the day I almost died because of stupid Manasseh.”
Things quickly escalated, and what started as a childish game turned into a complicated situation when Uriel panicked and called my mom because their parents weren’t home. Ever since that day, my mom got mad and banned me from hanging out with them. She didn’t even like the idea of us playing together anymore, so we ended up playing far away from home. We did a lot of stupid things in our childhood, but not all of them were my fault. I can say that Manasseh was the mastermind behind all the mischief. He always managed to lure me into dangerous games, and I could never resist the urge to prove to everyone that I wasn’t afraid, that I was just as capable as them, even though I’m a girl. Masse turned every invitation into a challenge I couldn’t refuse.
Girls have always been labeled as sensitive and fragile, but I wanted to be seen as strong and determined. I did everything I could to hide that typical girly vulnerability, just so I could be one of the guys, to feel like I belonged.
Sure, I admit, I might have looked like a delicate flower, but I didn’t want to be handled with care.
Manasseh seemed to get it, but Samael insisted on treating me like I was made of glass, and somehow, I didn’t mind the occasional attention he gave me.
Things haven’t changed much to this day. Samael is usually reserved around his brothers, but he becomes more talkative when we’re alone. I feel like he’s his true self when it’s just the two of us. And with him, I feel at ease.
“I came in because it’s raining and you guys were nowhere to be found,” Samael massages his neck gently, deliberately avoiding our gazes.
“Dad made us wash the barrels as a punishment ‘cause he caught us smoking. You know how it is…” Masse circles around the cave, shooting me a sly glance when he reaches the windowsill.
“No, I don’t know,” Samael says absentmindedly, looking off to the side.
“Of course, you wouldn’t know,” Masse scoffs annoyed. You’re dad’s golden boy, after all.
