AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Their dad opened a winery two years ago, turning his passion into a business, and things changed pretty quickly for them. Our family, on the other hand, remained modest, just like you’d expect from a religious household. Dad preaches at St. Giles’ Church, and Mom is a stay-at-home mom, but a different kind of stay-at-home mom compared to Anabella. When my mom cleans, Anabella has someone to do it for her. When my mom cooks, Anabella either orders in or has someone specially hired for the job. And when my mom goes shopping, she uses her own car that she drives herself, while Anabella has someone hired for that too. They’re both homemakers but in totally different ways.
“And here they go again…” Uri rolls his eyes and walks by me, kicking the forgotten agenda on the floor.
“What’s this?” Masse picks up the notebook where I managed to sketch something.
“It’s mine!” I jump off the ledge and reach out to grab the agenda.
“It’s the ugliest drawing I’ve ever seen!” Masse laughs hysterically while I still struggle to get my notebook back. Who’s this, Freddy Krueger?
“Give it back, you idiot!” I reach out, but Masse flips the page and starts reading out loud because the notebook isn’t just for drawings; I wrote down everything that crossed my mind in it.
“It’s September 13th, 2012. They say 13 is an unlucky number, but today has been my lucky day. I got an A+ in math” - smart girl, no surprise there, Masse comments sarcastically, leaving a bitter taste in my mouth - “But the best thing today was that I bumped into Samael during PE class- Oooh, Sami, you’re part of Becca’s secrets,” Masse laughs gleefully and tosses Uriel my notebook because I had almost climbed up his arm to reach it.
When Masse says his name, my breath hitches, and Samael’s eyes ignite. There’s a palpable awkwardness in the air, but it’s confined to me, and him, as we’re the central focus of the conversation.
I loathe the fact that my presence makes Samael feel uncomfortable. I detest causing him any distress. All I want is to bring him joy, for eternity.
“Quit reading! It’s a secret!” I try harder to get it back, my eyes burning and welling up.
“He was playing basketball with his dumb buddies, and my heart skipped a beat when he noticed me,” Uriel persists in reading, his tone dripping with sarcasm, and his voice thin as if he’s mimicking me.
“Hey, give it back!” I reach out, almost grasping it, but Uriel tosses it to Samael, who gazes at me with curiosity. As the agenda lands in his hands, my heart starts to settle, but when our eyes lock, it sends a shockwave through me, discovering within them what I never thought I’d find.
DISAPPOINTMENT— Is Samael plotting to betray me?!
He holds the written page for a few moments, his gaze fixed, yet he remains silent.
“Come on, read it out loud. Let us all hear,” Masse nudges his shoulder against Samael’s, while Uriel holds me back.
“I waved at him, and he smiled in return. That smile…” Samael pauses, a faint smirk appearing at the corner of his mouth, almost arrogantly, as if it holds the answer to his unanswered question.
You wouldn’t dare!
You can’t possibly do this to me.
Not you! I think at lightning speed, my going dry.
Masse grows irritated by Samael’s hesitation, so he snatches the agenda like a hungry hawk and continues reading.
“[...] it’s so beautiful. It’s a shame he smiles so rarely. But that’s just him. Samael is different.”
The boys start laughing at me. I feel awful, but amidst all the suffocating negative emotions, something else rises to the forefront.
The sensation burning in my chest, bigger than anything else, is called disappointment.
Why did you do it? I look at him, searching for answers in his cold eyes, but find nothing.
“Oh, so you’re into that smug dude’s smirk, huh?” Masse grabs Samael’s cheeks and pulls them teasingly, and Samael puts on a fake smile.
Samael snatches the notebook from under his arm and throws it at my feet.
His action stings even deeper.
It leaves me feeling used, betrayed, and disappointed.
Why am I feeling this way? I don’t even need to know the textbook definition of these emotions.
I’m only eleven, for fucks sake.
